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A huge number of areas in this world where's difficult to find water

nurainiyusuf16 47 / 83 6  
Nov 20, 2016   #1
What are the causes of water scarcity? What are your solutions?

Water becomes something that really precious at present, a huge number of areas in this world difficult to find water. Development of an industry in a country is one of the causes. This essay will first discuss about how a company can appear water scarcity, and then talk about what policy government should do to reduce the problem.

Waste materials from a factory not only cause air pollution, but also in society water source. Most of chemical substances as the result of company activities are thrown to river, dam, etc. In Indonesia, one of the big companies, called Lapindo, a Natural Gas and Earth Oil Company, threw all of their waste to a river near from inhabitants live place. As the result, people in that place hard to find water for their necessaries since the river as the main of water source throughout pollution. Not only in the river, company's waste also affected to live area of society at that place where most of them have to move in other place because their home cannot be used for staying as the impact of this industry's waster.

The only one side that can change the big company habit is government. An expert from Economy Industry, University of Indonesia, stated that government has the biggest authority to solve this problem by a policy. Brave action should be taken to make the company reduce their activities that can result was matter and eventually affect to human life. Stopping of company activities can be done if the warning is ignored by them.

All in all, one of causes that make water scarcity in an area is waste matter of company but it can be reduce if government take the assertive steps to these naughty companies.
ifraanisa05 44 / 70 6  
Nov 20, 2016   #2
Hai aini, again.
let me give you some suggestion

... only cause air pollution,(unnecessary comma in this type of compound sentence) but also in ...

... company activities are thrown tointo river,

... to move in other placeplaces because their home (...) of this industry's waster.waste
other + noun plural

... that can change the big company habitthe big company's habit is government.

Overall your essay is good, maybe if you add a suggestion in your conclusion, it will boost your score

Keep writing nur! :)
alfinkurnia 33 / 47  
Nov 20, 2016   #3

Water has becomes something that (...) in this world difficult to finding water. Development of an industry in a country is one of the causes. (This sentence is perfect you must know about that)

my tips: when you writing, you must know about grammar, and make sure your spelling is corect, donn't jump from one idea to the next topic or Go off topic, you must focus in your topic.

this is my correction for you, feel free to correction me too.

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