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IELTS : Why should human beings travel to outer space?


anb_duck /  
Nov 1, 2010   #1
This essay quite racked my brain. Need a lot of time to contemplate over 3 reasons. Tell me what you think. Thank you before :)

For many centuries, outer space has been one of the most favourable realms of study. Space expeditions have been launched and many have been successful. However, a lot of people still consider space exploration as an act of wasting money, to illustrate, astronauts only brought useless rocks back to planet earth despite the large sum of money spent on their equipment. On the other hand, there are some reasons for human beings to travel to outer space.

Firstly, many facts about solar system can be discovered. For instance, a picture of planet earth proved that the earth is round, not flat. Another example is that it is the earth which goes around the sun, not vice versa. If it was not for the space exploration, we would never know these facts.

Secondly, people can know more about the planet earth itself. By observing planet earth from outer space, people can find out ample things for example about the atmosphere of the planet earth. With this knowledge, people can work on something to prevent earth hazards such as global warming.

Finally, a great deal of sophisticated technology can be invented. As astronauts need to travel to outer space which does not have any oxygen to breathe in, scientists are compelled to do research on the oxygen tanks. Oxygen tanks, for instance, are proved useful not only in outer space but also underwater. Moreover, spaceships, communication satellites and space pens also contribute a lot to the society.

As a conclusion, I personally think that human beings should travel to outer space. In spite of costing a fortune, space exploration has given aforementioned benefits.

(271 words)

Llrosso89 1 / 1  
Nov 1, 2010   #2
Perhaps add in information about searching for life on other planets (aka exoplanets). There was an article out recently about finding the Goldilock's planet which was an exoplanet found with suitable environment for living. Astronomers then drew conclusions that out of the billions galaxies out there there has to be at least 5 billion habitable planets.

Improving space technology and travel will allow us to eventually visit said planets and if necessary allow earthlings to move there if necessary. Granted the earth and our sun have another so billion years left of life, our sun is still young in comparison to some other suns. Space travel will allow humans to visit these far galaxies where it is harder for us to see with a telescope. Telescopes only pick up light and reflected like which is why is makes it so hard to find exoplanets that are habitable.

Space travel will also allow us to see black holes (we currently do experiments on Earth, we create small black hole (about a millimeter) and test our theories on them) and see how a larger black hole actually functions albeit from a safe distance.

Perhaps we could also use space travel to visit Pluto and clarify its orbiting patterns. From observation we know Pluto and Charon rotate around one another and just large comets within the Kupier belt.

As for corrections to make: "Favourable" is not a word its "Favorable". The study of outer space is more commonly called Astronomy.

The sentence with saying 'an act of wasting money' sounds awkward and silly. Try: 'consider space exploration to be a waste of money' otherwise its just word vomit, I know your trying to keep the word count up but word vomit is worse.

First reason relates to a helio-centric solar system.

I think your essay is alright but a little vague and general. You should try expanding on it and adding in some interesting facts to prove you have more intelligence about the topic and that you genuinely believe humans should further their space travel.

Hope this helps.
Super 1 / 10  
Nov 1, 2010   #3
Hello.

It's good enough. Btw just want to add, favourable is British spelling, while favorable is American spelling. Depending on which one you choose, stick to it.

In terms of clarity, this essay is fine.

However, you can summarise some words. For instance, 'outer space which does not have any oxygen to breathe in' -> vacuum outer space. Sometimes, it's already implied that outer space is vacuum. Hence, it's kinda redundant to even say 'vacuum'. However, if you insist, you could use it.

There was a factual inaccuracy in the following sentences 'For instance, a picture of planet earth proved that the earth is round, not flat. Another example is that it is the earth which goes around the sun, not vice versa. If it was not for the space exploration, we would never know these facts.' I beg to differ that Aristotle had provided observations on the spherical shape of the Earth since 330 BC. Hence, it would be best not to assert the absolute 'we would never know these facts'

For more information, check out:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_Earth#Decline_of_the_Flat_Earth_model

Overall, it is a good attempt. Keep it up.
iishine 4 / 6  
Nov 2, 2010   #4
The first paragraph confuses me a little bit, there is no the contrast relationship between the reasons for human beings to travel to outer space and space exploration is an money-wasting act ,so i think the "on the other hand" is not very accurate.
OP anb_duck /  
Nov 12, 2010   #5
thank you for all your feedbacks. it really helps me a lot :)


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