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IELTS - illness prevention, promoting healthy lifestyles?



ekekek 25 / 50  
Aug 8, 2011   #1
Some people think that to prevent illness, it is more important for the government to spend public money on promoting healthy lifestyles than to spend it on the treatment of people who are already ill. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Regarding the method to prevent illness, two options of the government seems reasonable: healthy lifestyles' promotion or treatment for the sick. From my perspective, both prevention and treatment of the authorities sound necessary in medical care.

To avoid serious illness, sticking a wholesome lifestyles is of help. As we all know that the diseases come into being for long, not for a day. In other word, eating junk food, such as hamburger, for several days when workers are too busy to have dinners, it will not seriously damage those people's health. However, if people keep this harmful habit every day, many diseases will follow. That's because the fast food diet is a major contributor to serious health problems such as obesity and heart disease. Therefore, the government should allocate more money to advocate the healthy lifestyle as citizens are taxpayers.

On the other hand, the patients should be thought highly of by the government and given proper treatment. Even though the authorities have limited budget for many infrastructure facilities development, the quality of citizens' living should be the priority. Only when the sick get better after treatment, can lift a sense of happiness among people. Furthermore, adequate treatments to the ill convey the care from the society, which benefits the form of harmonious society.

To conclude, two ways to prevent illness sound productive. But either of the two needs the support from government. With adequate money and being spent wisely, I believe, the task of preventing diseases could be fulfilled through prevention of wholesome lifestyle and proper treatment to the already sick.

boxu53 2 / 4  
Aug 8, 2011   #2
Hi,

I briefly read your essay. Maybe you need a more clear topic and to write three or four paragraphs to support your topic. Although you believe both options are necessary, you may still have to choose one you believe that is more important. Besides, you may find some specific facts or logical evidence to support your main idea. One paragraph of supporting on each one may not be a good idea. I am not professional, so if my suggestion is not useful, or not accurate, please forgive me. Thanks.


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