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It is important for all towns and cities to have large public outdoor places like squares and parks.



Tuyet Trinh 1 / -  
Jul 30, 2024   #1
It is argued by some that building large public outdoor places like squares and parks is very essential for all towns and cities. From my perspective, I strongly agree with this idea because it plays an integral part to the growth of the country.

First of all, nowadays, international integration is getting important and people have demand for relaxation and entertainment. They would like take part in community events, sport competitions or musical concerts to experience new stuff and enlarge their knowledge so having a large square is very important. For instance, Final UEFA EURO 2024 was organized in Olympiastadion Stadium in Germany with 71,000 seats, which is tremendous. Germany has not only Olympiastadion but also other famous stadiums which help this country attract lots of foreigners and make profit.

Another point worth noting is that to have public outdoor places is very convenient for people. Teenagers have tendency to hang out after working hard to recharge their battery. They often walk around a park or an open space to breathe fresh air. Building a park also has impact on impoving the environment. In most of towns and cities, inhabitant use many vehicles, which means the air is getting more polluted. If pupils plant more trees in the park, we could reduce carbon dioxide and have more oxygen.
Last but not least, building public toilets will have some advantages. To give an example, in a rainy, somebody are unfortunately blotted by spatters when crossing the road, those will need a public toilets to change clothes and wash the hands. Furthermore, children usually want to play outside all day, when childs want to poop, parents can let them relieve himself incontinently in chalet.

To draw the conclusion, all towns and cities need to build large public outdoors places to satisfy the people's demand and develop the country.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15460  
Jul 31, 2024   #2
The paraphrasing is acceptable, although calling this an argument is an exaggeration. A discussion would have more aligned as a proper word choice for this topic. Your opinion is clear and the reason behind it is sound and completely establishes the writer's opinion for the succeeding discussion.

However, your reasoning paragraphs are problematic. First of all, the UEFA cup that you chose to discuss took place in a sports stadium rather than a square or park. So that means that you misunderstood the meaning of public outdoor spaces are was referenced in the original prompt. Second, a public toilet discussion does not align with the discussion. That is more relevant to a sanitation discussion rather than a public square or park reference. Finally, Only the second paragraph aligns with the discussion and therefore, will manage to get a full scoring consideration.

Sadly, there is no way that this essay will receive a passing score because of the way that you accidentally deviated from the original discussion references. Additionally, you did not meet the requirements for the concluding summary paragraph. There needs to be 40 words, covering 2 sentences of summarized discussion provided in that paragraph.


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