IELTS TASK 2: Individuals have changed their way in interaction

NOWADAYS THE WAY MANY PEOPLE INTERACT WITH EACH OTHER HAS CHANGED BECAUSE OF TECHNOLOGY.
IN WHAT WAYS HAS TECHNOLOGY AFFECTED THE TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS POEPLE MAKE ?

HAS THIS BECOME A POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT

A school of thought holds that individuals have changed their way in interaction. The key rationale for this situation is the affect of technology. In this essay, the author will prove why technology has made the relationships more close. Also, this is a positive development.

It is understandable why technology helps the relationships of individuals more tight. The first thing that needs metioning is convenience. In comparison to the past, people had to go to a particular destination to meet and talk . Also, if they were in a long distance relationship, they had to send letters which is only recieved after a few days. As today, many inventions served people to interact have born. Individuals can enjoy every moment together and it makes their relationship more tight . Not only the convenience but also the intelligence of technology participates in improving people's relationships. Base on a true story on BBC's news, there was a girl who got lost her parents in 2015. Then a kind women found her and decided to post her picture on facebook. This kind of social media can realize her face because it had appeared in her family's picture on Facebook. In the end, an announcement sent to her parents and they got their child back. Thus, technology is a vital factor to tight people's relationship.

Like the author have already mentioned, technology helps people to interact. So this is a good development. If people can interact with others any time, they will do that more often. Not only with their family but also stranghers that they want to make friends. Besides, due to the appearance of technology, individuals can develop their jobs. It is obvious that many job interviews are now sent by emails and phones instead of letters or face to face.

In conclusion, the appearance of technology has made the relationships people make more tight and it has become a positive developments.

There is a difference in word meaning between affect and effect:

affect- verb ; to act on; produce an effect or change in:

effect - noun ; something that is produced by an agency or cause; result; consequence:

Effect is the word that should have been used. Word meaning affects the idea presentation of a sentence. Improper word usage causes incorrect meaning and idea development. It affects the clarity of the overall presentation and can confuse or mislead the reader. Word usage and word meaning familiarity is important.

The thesis response also lacks clarity because the statement was divided into 3 parts rather than being blended into a single presentation :

Human interaction has changed in a positive manner due to technology.

Combine all the information highlights into one presentation to create an effective thesis sentence.

The essay has a good but researched example. stick closer to home. How has our interaction with others improved when compared to how our parents used to do it? That gets a better consideration as it is based on personal experience.

No author was mentioned in the prompt. This sentence misleads the reader. The rest of the paragraph is still on point and helps further explain the - of the writer. The concluding paragraph can use a better presentation. Try using 2 - 3 sentences to restate the discussion points next time. It will help with s a clearer post discussion summary to the reader.

As Holt had mentioned, affect (V) and effect (N) are different and misusing the correct word harms your clarity.
Also, your example is through researching online, you should have closer examples without having to memorize.
You are the author, so you should use "I" instead to express your ideas.