Information crime rates in Newport city center in 2003 and 2010

The chart gives information regarding the number of incidents in Newport city center between 2003 and 2010. Overall, the most striking point is that all of areas experienced a downward trend throughout the whole period in the question. However, the crime rate of burglary decreased dramatically after peaking at the second year.

According to the chart, burglary had the highest number of crime rate at the starting period. It stood at 3,500 in 2003 and increased gradually in the next year before their figures saw a dramatic fell by about 2,500 in 2008 to finish at just under 2,000 at the end of the period in question. Following this, between 2003 and 2005, the figure of incident for car theft remained stable. After dropping in 2006, this rose back to the same figure at the beginning of the period.

Moving to a more detailed analysis from the chart reveals that the figure of robbery war far lower than another. Standing at over 500 in 2003, the trend fluctuated from 2004 to 2010 before coming back to the first number in the last year in the chart.

Clearly, in 2012, if we analyze the data we can see that the gap between the three areas had narrowed considerately after the number of car theft overtook between 2006 and 2007.

• 
  ielts_1.jpg
  

A few points
Para 1:


I think I should rewrite this paragraph, since the accuracy of the report presented cannot be verified. A closer look at my model sentences:The line chart gives a breakdown of the changes from criminal rates in city center of Newport from 2003 to 2012, a 9-year period. Overall, while the rate of burglary shows downwards, car theft experiences a slight increase. However, the trend of robbery remains unchanged over the time frame.

Para 2:
Sentence 1 should be "...burglary RECORDED the highest number of crime RATES..."
Sentence 2 should be "...the initial number amounted to 3,500 in 2003... before ITS figure..."
Sentence 3 should be "...this WAS SIGNS OF AN INCREASE RECOVERY TO the same figure.."

Para 3:
Sentence 1 should be "... BY far..."
Sentence 2 should be "... before showing a gradual rebound to the 2003 figure..."

Para 4:
if we analyze the data ( a comma ) we can see...

My advice: always save your time around 3-5 minutes for proofreading prior to ending your report. Hope this helps, eddy suaib.