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[TOEFL] The internet provides people with a lot of valuable info or problems?


ramshah 11 / 27 5  
Mar 23, 2014   #1
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Some people say that the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information. Others think access to so much information creates problems. Which view do you agree with?

There is a huge amount of information on the internet and this has both advantages and disadvantages. Taking into account these two aspects, when it comes to the issue of the internet and its information, some people believe that the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information while some others think that access to so much information creates problems. In my view, the statement that the internet provides people with a great deal of valuable information carries more weight than the latter for following reasons and explanations:

The reason for choosing my opinion in that so much information on the internet has numerous distinct benefits that can not be found in other sources of knowledge. One benefit is that we can access to information about any subjects that we want to know and learn about in any time. There is information about everything on the internet. We can simply type our topics about a variety of subjects in search engines like Google, Yahoo and so forth. Then by observing a long list of searched websites in an instant, we will be able to find the answer to our questions. For example, when I want to gain knowledge about psychology, math, biology, art and anything else, I can easily refer to the internet and take advantage of its infinite amount of information. As you can see, no other thing gives us such speed, variety and convenience.

Another benefit is that there is also a great deal of data, statistics and information which are becoming up-to-date moment by moment. Nowadays the rate of advancement and development of science is so fast that all books and other reading materials get out-of- date after a few years and even several months. And that makes us buy newer books that increase our expenses as well. But thanks to the internet, by using a few clicks, we will be able to access to the most up-to-date and accurate information without buying any reading materials like books, newspaper and magazines. This is another unique advantage of the internet information.

However, accessing to so much information can have its own problems, too. For example, young, inexperienced and uneducated people might not have the ability to distinguish useful and valid information from inaccurate and false information. They may get confused when encountering much information and give much importance to the false and even harmful information which can be quite dangerous sometimes and mislead them. For example, young people by reading about some false information about addictive drugs might assume that they have no negative impacts on their lives. So, too much information can be sometimes problematic as well.

To sum up, as the old adage goes : "A coin has two sides", those who take the other side are partially reasonable every once in a while. However, in my opinion, the statement that the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information outweighs the second statement because there is no better substitution for the information on the internet because of its mentioned distinct advantages.

eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Mar 23, 2014   #2
Helloooo Friend :D

psychology, math, biology, art and anything else

You don't need to use 'Lazy expression.' This belongs more to oral communication

any subjects that we want to know and learn about in any time.

You don't need to use 'Vague language.' This communicates too much informality.

508 words... did you finish it within 30 minutes?
If it is not, then you better concentrate more on answering the task on time rather than lengthening your essay.

Do you write 5 paragraphs? Yes. You write one introduction, three bodies, and one conclusion. In the bodies, you develop ideas by writing two content paragraphs arguing for and one against. This can help you write more words, but some students, that I see, put grandiose ideas, by writing too many words. Also, I see there is an undeveloped conclusion or introduction

To justify what I'm saying, let's have a look at the Intro:

There is a huge amount of information on the internet and this has both advantages and disadvantages. Taking into account these two aspects, when it comes to the issue of the internet and its informationThe Internet has allowed some people to share information in minutes. While others believe that the internet provides people with a lot of valuable information while , some otherspeople think that access tooso much information creates problems. However, I believe the Internet would have have more merits in contrast to having several demeritsthe statement that the internet provides people with a great deal of valuable information carries more weight than the latter for following reasons and explanations:

the conclusion:

"A coin has two sides"

You'd better rewrite this expression. What I see is that many students think the memorization of the perfect answer is much more acceptable. Therefore they use it every time. And to tell you the truth it doesn't impress the readers at all because it is too common for words .

Well then, let's go on the 4 paragraphs.

With a 4-paragraph essay, you are easy to develop your paragraph properly, one content paragraph for, and one againts. This is good for coherence and cohesion between the sentence-paragraph-essay development, and for which in the five paragraphs this is weak.

Hope this helps :D
sandipsinh 37 / 90 3  
Mar 23, 2014   #3
There is a huge amount(abundance) information

Use abundance in place of huge amount.
dumi 1 / 6,927 1592  
Mar 24, 2014   #4
Would you please make a comment about its content?

Well, you have good points. However, you need to pay attention to presentation of your sentences and also the essay structure if you are keen on going for a good score on TOEFL Writing. Here are some of the things I found ;

One benefit is that we can access to information about any subjectssubject that we want to know and learn about in any time
Another benefit is that there is also a great deal of data, statistics and information which are becoming up-to-date moment by moment.updated almost real time.
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Mar 24, 2014   #5
I think you better pay more attention to your essay structure. As it is , your essay looks a bit too lengthy and you may not be able to manage time for the task.


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