Job satisfaction and how to have job satisfaction from all workers

Please help me check this essay!

Topic
As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.
What factors contributes to job satisfaction?
How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

job working life appreciation

Essay
It is true that working occupies major time in human lives, and job satisfaction plays an important role in individual happiness. In my opinion, there is a wide range of factors affecting job satisfaction; therefore it is quite unrealistic to make all workers satisfied.

Even though people differ from others in terms of what they require in job, there are several factors contributing to a satisfying working life. Firstly, some people don't care much about what professions they are pursuing as long as their salary are high enough to allow them to meet their survival needs and enjoy life outside work. Secondly, personal relationships and atmosphere in workplace are extremely important for others. For example, having friendly colleagues accompanied with an inspirational and instructive manager can make they receive higher levels of satisfaction. Finally, many people's job satisfaction derives from their professional achievement, such as the experiences they gain, the skills they enhance and the position they reach.

Due to these diverse factors I mentioned above, I believe gaining job satisfaction from all workers is quite impractical. Obviously, people have different purposes when working and it is hard to meet all of their demands at the same time. If a person desires to work in the creative environment, for instance, a company which has strict regulations and principles won't be able to give he or she enough motivation. Furthermore, there are many people with different characters working at the same workplace, having conflict is inevitable; as a result, some suggestions which are approval by someone could be unacceptable for others. However, although it is unlikely that all workers feel happy in their work, some measures can be carried out to improve job satisfaction in any job.

In conclusion, there are several elements people can do in order to have a satisfying job working life, but this is by no means to fulfill every people's satisfaction.

Thanks a lot!!!

Hi @Annie Tran 162

I think your introduction need at least one more sentence because normally that part includes minimum 3 sentences.
contributing => contribute

However, I think your essay is good.
Good luck!

Help with mine => IELTS Task 2 Topic: sports event, Type: Discuss both view

Annie, you misunderstood the last question in the prompt. The question relates to whether or not an employee can find job satisfaction based upon a preset criteria. You presented the response in your opening statement as having employers try to provide job satisfaction to the employees. Those are two hugely different sets of criteria and sadly, your interpretation is the wrong one. In fact, your overall opening statement was placed into error because of this misunderstanding of the last question. The more appropriate opening statement would have been:

Job satisfaction is considered to be one of the important elements of an adult's well being at work. As such, it is believed that these workers have specific job requirements that need to be fulfilled in order to allow the worker to gain a sense of job satisfaction. The problem, is that there may be some difficulty when it comes to fulfilling job satisfaction criteria for workers in a real setting. This essay will discuss the factors that contribute to job satisfaction and whether or not these factors can realistically be achieved by employees in the workplace.

If you want to create a strong body paragraph, do not list your discussions in numerical order in a single paragraph. You need to individually discuss those points in separate paragraphs. Since you are limited to only 5 paragraphs, with 5 sentences each, that will not be a wise thing to try and do within 30 minutes. Your essay will receive a better score if you focus on discussing just one job satisfaction criteria, one that you think is the most valid, within one paragraph.

The remaining 2 bodies should then discuss the remaining questions being posed by the original prompt. Those questions relate to the possibility of creating the job satisfaction scenario in the workplace, and if it can truly be achieved in the modern day workplace. If you think it can be achieved, then explain why. If you think it can't, provide reason why you think it won't be possible. Those are the proper methods by which to discuss the essay instructions.

Try to expand on your concluding statement. Make an effort to deliver at least 3 sentences in your concluding summary statement so that you will have a better chance of gaining a higher C&/c score. The only requirement of that part of the scoring criteria is that you write an understandable complete paragraph. That is best done within 3-5 sentences. Show off your English writing skills as best as you can. Don't limit yourself to just one or two sentences per paragraph. Take advantage of the advised number of sentences per paragraph whenever you can.