Language: Scientists say that in the future humanity will speak the same language.

one universal language for the mankind

Topic: Scientists say that in the future humanity will speak the same language. Do you think this is a positive or negative social development?
With the tremendous pace of globalization, it is expected that a universal language would be used as a means of communication. While the trend has advantages, I strongly believe that it would be seriously detrimental to humans being.

On the one hand, emergence of a global language brings benefits in terms of educational perspective. Universal language facilitates the exposure to knowledge constructed many countries in the world without barriers. In Vietnam, for example people could effortlessly broaden their horizon from technological advancements of developed nation like the United States through books and television because these information sources are used the same language. Furthermore, the phenomenon also accelerates the economic growth. In industrialization's era, a host of grant groups maximize their profit by carrying out trade strategies and expand investment in over the world. When people are beyond the language boundaries, it is easier for partnership to collaborate and exchange contracts and therefore increases their productivity for both host nations and foreign investors.

On the other hand, the adoption of universal language inevitably triggers many serious problems. Firstly, language assimilation leads to the extinction of minority ones and trivialization of cultural identities which are attached to it. Dialect for instance, is a popular means of communication of some communities which symbolize origins and valuable traditional customs and the values were formed and developed over thousands of decade ago. If the language lost away, it is inevitable that the beauty of ancient culture would be faded into obscurity. In fact, the disappearance of indigenous languages affects adversely cultural diversity. Furthermore, historical values also put at stake as a consequence of this trend. It is clear that many written documentaries which recorded victories in the past only are preserved in museums instead of using as information to educate patriotism due to the fact later generations have not relevant knowledge of country's language.

In conclusion, although a universal language has several benefits, the drawbacks are far more significant.

Tran, you cannot say "thousand of decade ago". A decade is equal to 10 years, which is a singular form of the word as it represents 1 decade. When you say "thousands" you are referring to the plural form of decade so it should be written as "thousands of decades..." with an S to signify the plural form of the word. This is a noun phrase disagreement that you should be conscious of.

By the way, you wrote too many words. You cannot handwrite 322 words within 40 minutes during the test. It cannot be done. You can only write between 250-275 words, leaving some minutes for the editing of your work. If you write 300 or more, you will not be able to edit your paper before submitting it and the errors you made will remain and be considered when scoring your paper. You need to write only the right number of words so that you can present a proof read paper at the very least.

This is also a single opinion, not a comparison paper. By asking you; "Do you think this is a positive or negative social development?", the discussion indicates that you are to choose one side of the discussion to support in your reasoning paragraphs using at least 2 supporting reasons/examples. Your essay is doing a comparison format discussion which runs counter to your indicated opinion of; "I strongly believe that it would be seriously detrimental to humans being." Therefore the essay will only be scored for the discussion that falls under the proper TA response that you presented in your paraphrase.

Your concluding sentence is unacceptable. That has to be in the form of a reverse paraphrase. It must indicate the topic for discussion, your opinion, supporting reasons, and a closing sentence. It must be composed of at least 3 sentences to be considered a complete paragraph. This is the same mistake that you made with your original prompt paraphrase so that it also fell under the minimum sentence requirement.