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Writing task: Learning right or wrong and punishment of the children



nerdypmns 1 / -  
Jan 11, 2023   #1
Essay Title:
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age.
Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?


What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?


Children are the age that they don't know about the world or society that much. It is quite hard to know what is correct and what is wrong. This is to say, parents need to teach them what it should be or shouldn't be. But sometimes the way that they use to teach their kids is wrong too. Punishment is significant to make the kids know that they must not do that. On the other hand, some people are questioning about some punishment whether it's too much. So I disagree with punishing the children and will give my opinions below.

Nowadays, there's a lot of children growing up. In Asia, there's a lot of parents that still punish their kids by scolding and beating them. Is it a good thing to do ? This method might be useful for some kinds of children, But in the family, violence should not exist. When the children are scolded or beaten, it might haunt them for a long time. For instance, there's a lot of news that shows that the kids are scolded and beaten, mostly panicked, absent-minded, depressed and repressed. Even the punishment wasn't that harsh, but if they are often punished, the kids might be repressed and think that they're not good enough for their parents.

Instead of punishing them, why don't parents teach and talk nicely to their children? Perhaps, the reason why the children still do wrong behaviour is because they don't know why it is wrong. Parents should tell them the reason why they have to do this and not do this, what's the consequences of this act and how people feel after this act. Giving them reasons makes the children understand a lot of things and grow up a lot.

In conclusion, punishment isn't the best way to teach children, especially the violence is extremely unjustifiable. Talking nicely and giving reasons are more useful. These things help the children grow up to be good adults in the future. I strongly insist that the punishment should not be physical, rather psychological and practical.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15345  
Jan 12, 2023   #2
The first major reason that this essay will fail is that you did not follow the writing requirements. You were asked for the extent of your dis/agreement and what sort of punishments teachers and parents can apply to erring students and children. Not only did you fail to deliver a measured response, you also altered the second discussion topic by not giving a relevant response to it. As the full discussion you wrote no longer provided the correct content, the examiner will have no choice but to give an overall failing score with regards to response accuracy. You failed the test because you did not understand both the questions and writing instructions.

The second failing reason relates to the word count. The essay has an excessive but irrelevant to the discussion word count. An examiner would most certainly say that this essay never had a chance at a passing score.


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