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IELTS WRITING TASK 2 - As a learning tool for young people, the media is better than experiences.


minhthu06 1 / -  
Aug 16, 2022   #1
Nowadays young people mostly learn by reading books or watching movies and TV shows, rather than personal experiences.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?



It is true that juveniles these days demonstrate their personal preference for different media such a books or films instead of putting emphasis on hands-on experiences while learning. While I acknowledge that there are still a certain number of people who prefer the latter, I think that it is more resonable to widen young people's knowledge via books and films.

On the one hand, the idea of learning through real-life experiences is beneficial due to its provision of practical knowledge. This can be explained by the fact that firsthand experiences offer individuals the authentic sensation as well as a long-lastting understanding of a myriad of subjects. For example, in comparision with reading a book about the process of making ceramics, participating in making them will greatly enhance people's comprehension of its production. Therefore, people's knowledge about a subject will definitely last longer and be more useful.

Despite the above-mentioned advantage, I believe that learning through books and TV is more recommendable in terms of financial affairs. This is because books or TV shows are considerably less expensive when compared to the payment for hands-on experiences. A book about the history and geography of Hoi An - a UNESCO World Heritage site in Vietnam, for instance, is much more affordable than a journey to this breathtaking hotspot. As a result, with general less money and time, people can utilize a widd range of data for learning purposes, thus widen their horizons and knowlege.

In conclusion, although rel-life experiences present a particular advantage with regard to offering pragmatic knowledge, from my perspective, it is more beneficial to gain knowledge by means of books of TV due to its inexpensive cost.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,919 4799  
Aug 17, 2022   #2
Since the response for this essay is to be based on a measured response, the opening sentence cannot begin by saying "It is true..." as this indicates a prompt deviation on the part of the writer. He has changed the response format for the essay to the point where the expected response format was not delivered to the examiner. The result will be an essay that does not fully meet the accuracy requirements.

The writer's response itself is self-defeating as he relays that "I think" rather than "I fully/partially/absolutely" to name but a few acceptable response types, in the essay. By indicating "I think", he indicates uncertainty in his opinion sentence. This proves to be a scoring problem since his lack of personal opinion confidence indicates an opinion that lacks clarity. If he cannot support his opinion as required, then he has already failed the test.

Since this is not a comparative essay discussion, the reasoning paragraphs will be seen as under developed and sometimes, improperly referenced. That is based on the requirement that the writer defend his opinion using 2 connected reasons in cohesive paragraphs. Only one essay will receive scoring merit since only one paragraph supports the uncertain opinion of the writer.

These observations are only some of the immediate reasons that the essay will not be given a passing score. The writer's lack of response familiarity and his inability to support one solid point of view are the main failing points.


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