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LIFE IN A CITY IS MUCH BETTER THAN LIFE IN THE COUNTRYSIDE/ TOEFL ESSAY



kretoszczur 1 / -  
Apr 7, 2013   #1
Hi, I am new here. I only wrote 238 words in 30 minutes, so I do not know it is enough to get a high score on the toefl exam. Please correct any mistakes and rate it You could.

Topic : Life in a city is much better than life in the countryside

As far as I am concerned, I agree with the statement that life in a city is much better than life in the countryside.

Firstly, in the city there is much better education system. This means, that the schools and the universities have well equipped classes and the famous professors would like to work in such places.

In addition, I believe that city provides more work opportunities than the countryside. There are not only more jobs, but they are also well-paid. Of course living in a city is more expensive, but incomes are higher too.

Moreover, in the urban areas there are also more citizens what means, that the culture diversity is huge. Meeting and knowing new people's tradition is an unforgettable experience, which could influence on one's previous habits.

Furthermore, the city has well-organised lines of transport. The buses and trains are more frequent than in the countryside, so the city provides better communication.

However, in the countryside there are many places to rest, because of its location. Moreover, peaceful and close to the nature areas could help to avoid worries and sadness.

Taking all into account, I think that living in the city is much better nowadays, because of the opportunities it gives. Today living in the rural places is in most causes connected with agrarian lifestyle, which for me is without perspective. If I could decide I would chose living in the city for sure.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Apr 12, 2013   #2
As far as I am concerned, I agree with the statement that life in a city is much better than life in the countryside.

This is a too short introduction and you would not gain enough marks for this. Introduce your topic first and then state your opinion. This should not look like a direct answer to your prompt, but a well presented essay. This is my suggestion;

The place where we live is an important decision we make in our lives. Some people believe that city is a much better place for living compared to living in the countryside. I too agree with this view due to vast opportunities that a city can offer in contrast to a small town.
xucoi 14 / 41  
Apr 12, 2013   #3
To begin with, as far as i'm known that if you use "firstly", the next paragraph, you should follow the hierarchy secondly, thirdly...

Next, it seems that you have not give particular idea yet. For instances,

Moreover, in the urban areas there are also more citizens what means, that the culture diversity is huge. Meeting and knowing new people's tradition is an unforgettable experience, which could influence on one's previous habits.

. You can put it in the first main idea of education system because "meeting and knowing tradition" is aslo a comprehension of knowledge. :D. It will raise your argument and clarify your main idea.

Finally, your essay should add more adverbs. It will make your essay smooth and easier to read.
Although i'm also preparing for IELTS, It is my some objective views. Hope it will be useful for you.
Xucoi. :D


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