WRITING TASK 1 - The line chart exhibits the comparison between Chinese and American birth rate

THE BIRTH RATES OF CHINA AND THE USA

The line chart exhibits the comparison in the Chinese birth rate with the USA one and how it altered over an 80-year period.
From an overall perspective, there was a decline in the birth rate of both countries from 1920 to 2000. Despite the similarity in terms of decreasing trend, the American birth rate still remained higher than the Chinese one in most years.

In the 1920-1950 period, the birth rate of the US wildly fluctuated. There was a sharp fall in the 1940s, from above 10% in 1940 to below 5% 5 years later. However, in 1950, the American birth rate reached the highest point with exactly 15% over 80 years. From 1950 to 2000, the birth rate in the US constantly dropped, which fell to nearly 7% by the year 2000.

Over the same period, the Chinese birth rate had a more varied fluctuation than the American one. From 1940 to 1945, it maintained its level at 5% before it reached the highest point of the whole line graph with 20% in 1950. Nevertheless, it rapidly fell to below 10% just 5 years later and then plummeted nonstop until 2000 with approximately 2%.

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@phuongmai19899
hello! I think it will be better if you use grammar structures Before+Ving in order to avoid repeating S (it) in line 8

There should have been a comparison paragraph in this essay. There are overlapping points that you failed to mention. If you look at the line graph closely, you should see that there are in-between years when the numbers for the two countries are equal. Those should have been reported in the data. Of specific importance are the years 1945 and 1955. While there are individual data to report, there are comparative points to indicate as well. Since the instruction for this essay always includes: "Make comparisons where relevant", then you should really be on the lookout for these overlapping points. It shows that you did not just glance at the data, but that you actually took at least 5 minutes to study the image and take note of important information to report.