Unanswered [14] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


The line graph below gives information on cinema attendance in the UK.


sharfina 35 / 21 5  
Jan 20, 2016   #1
The line graph below gives information on cinema attendance in the UK.

A breakdown of the proportion of cinema attendance in the UK in four different age cohorts from 1990 to 2010 is illustrated in the line graph. Overall, more peope aged 14 to 54 went to cinema,while people in age group 14 to 24 did not enjoy going to cinema. All figures witnessed upward trends.

Initially, in 1990, cinema was by far the favorite for 44 to 54 age group and people aged 34 to 44, with nearly 40 % . Meanwhile, fewer people aged 14 to 24 enjoyed to go to cinema, accounting for 15 %. Another figure saw just over 20 %. By 2010, all figures had witnessed a rise. A gap between people in age group 44 to 54 and 34 to 44 had widened out. The former accounted for above 50% and the latter amounted to just over 40 %. Others had seen stable from 2005 to 2010 and they had reached 32% and 20% for 24-34 and 14-24 brackets.

Between 1995 and 2000, all figures saw a drop. The proportion of people in age groups 44 to 54 and 34 to 44 was a hit lof of around below 50% and this was followed a continous and steady increase. Those of people aged 24 to 34 was 22 %, while 12 % of people aged 14 to 24 attended the cinema.



vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Jan 21, 2016   #2
Try to use more connecting words in your sentences. Also, keep in mind that the report is supposed to present facts from surveys that have already been taken and therefore, represent a past event. Use the past tense word forms at all times in order to keep with the time indication of the report.

... four different age cohorts GROUPS from ... more peope PEOPLE aged...went to THE cinema,while people in age group AGED 14 to 24... going to THE cinema. All figures SAW upward...

... THE cinema was ... favorite for THE 44 to 54 age group... with nearly 40 % ATTENDANCE . ... enjoyed GOING to go to THE cinema... witnessed a rise AN INCREASE. ... in THE age group 44 to 54 and 34 to 44 ... 2010 and they had reached 32% and 20% for ...

... people in THE age groups 44 to 54 and 34 to 44 was a hit lof LOW OF of around below 50% and this was followed BY a continous CONTINUOUS and ... aged 24 to 34 was AT 22 %, ...


Home / Writing Feedback / The line graph below gives information on cinema attendance in the UK.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳