The line graph gives information about the fluctuations of food price index and average oil price

the graph below shows changes in global food and oil prices between 2000 and 2011

The line graph gives information about the fluctuations of food price index and average oil price in the world from 2000 to 2011.
Overall, the both points of food and oil prices were a correlation. Furthermore, It is remarkable that the oil price was higher than another.
Looking at the graph in detail, while the food price index was about 90 points and the oil price was 20$ at the same in 2000, at the end of 2011 that was a significant growth to around 240 point and 100$, respectively.

Additionally, there was a dramatic rise at the highest points of oil price at about 130 dollars in middle 2008, the figure for the food price index was at 220 points. After only a half year, the both index witnessed a deep drop to 140 points of food index and about 40$ for oil index in 2009. Luckily, the both indexes were the back increase and there was a recovery at the end of the period which was given.

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There is a correlation measurement indicated in the original image. When the writer referred to the correlation, that specific measurement should have been included. That is a very important part of the presentation and the examiner would have expected to read a complete mention of it as it was highlighted in red within the data presentation. It should have been referred to as the only trending reference in the report.

When creating the data paragraphs, the information must be separated by various punctuation marks such as commas and periods. Every sentence must be properly developed either as a complex or simple sentence. The second paragraph does not meet this data and sentence presentation requirement. As a run on, it fails to add clarity and coherence to the report.