Unanswered [8] / Urgent [0] / SERVICES
Home / Writing Feedback 4

The maps illustrate how Meadowside village and Fonton, which is a neighboring town - development

The maps illustrate how Meadowside village and Fonton, which is a neighboring town, have developed over three different time periods (1962, 1985 and the present).
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

transformation of Meadowside - analisys

Three maps are provided for analysis of the transformation in Meadowside village and the nearby town of Fonton. The time points chosen for the purpose are 1962, 1985 and the present. In this essay, I will summarize their developments in size and infrastructure, and make comparisons wherever relevant.

Overall, Meadowside and Fonton alike have undergone immense changes. They used to be completely separate but merge together as they both expand far beyond their original size. Initially as a village, Meadowside is converted to a suburb where a range of facilities are created.

In 1962, Meadowside was a small village in the west, located on a narrow road curving north to west. In contrast, Fonton was a town of modest size in the east end, situated on a railway winding north to east. This year, there was no transport route connecting Meadowside and Fonton, nor did any other facility exist.

In 1985, there was considerable growth in the size of Meadowside and Fonton. The road intersecting Meadowside was upgraded to a broader one, from which a new road branched off east to communicate it with Fonton. Around the convergence of these roads sprung up a leisure complex, a housing estate and a supermarket.

Currently, Meadowside, which is now a suburb, and Fonton have united as a result of further expansions. A new railway extends to the west where a station comes into existence. To its north is established a hotel; across the east-west road from the station lies a newly-built business park.

Though map comparison tasks are not common, I have to prepare for them that do appear the test. I try to develop my own style of map comparison writing.

I would more appreciate it if you score my essay.

I'm also preparing for the test just like you, so my comment may not be very useful :)) However, here are some thoughts I have in mind after reading your essay:

- Good points: the outline is clear, I can recognize what your essay and each paragraph is talking about. Your vocabulary is complex and varied.
- Something you may want to improve:
+ The introduction has some repeated phrases with the prompt. Maybe you want to paraphrase the prompt more.
+ It seems to me that you did not focus on the change in size. A clearer description of how sizes of these two areas change over three time periods is recommended.

Hope this helps. Good luck!
Oct 11, 2017   #3
Gang, we are looking at another possible 8 score for this essay. Ever since you started developing your own writing style, I have noticed that your writing has improved to the point where you can now just focus on proper analysis of the information rather than the presentation of the information. Remember, I told you that when you become comfortable writing in your own way, the essays will fall into place on its own? It looks like you are well on your way to making writing these essays second nature to yourself. One point for revision though, when you are discussing a past year, never use the present tense of "This year..." to signify the place in time. You need to practice referring to past instances in various formats such as "During that year", "In the same year", or "Based upon information from the same year..." among other possible phrase presentations in reference to past time. I admire you for being extra prepared for the test. You obviously want to do your best so you are over preparing this early. Be careful though, you don't want to burn out before the actual test date comes. You might run out of steam and end up not doing so well in the actual test. Pace yourself with the exercises. Your exam isn't till next year. Take it easy and don't overdo the preparation.
Thank you. It is quite considerate of you to give me the advice. I would like to reassure you that my stamina will not flag.

When I started to write IELTS essay a couple months ago, my goal was quite simple, that is, preparing the writing section, the most formidable challenge to the applicants in China mainland. My fellows excel at Listening and Reading, so much so that even a 9 for one of the sections are not uncommon in my country. However, when it comes to Writing, most of us can barely score a 6 or even lower. That is largely because there are myriad dubious gurus and misleading recommendations of the test in my country. As a non native English learner, I cannot make difference between good and bad, right and wrong. So frustrated and beguiled, I fell short of giving up the test.

That's why I felt as if I found a new world when I went to the forum. Your authoritative and conscientious advice lighted my path, dispelled my misgivings and breathed confidence into my mind. I practiced writing accordingly and enjoyed every inch of progress. Fatigue rarely overtook me, as I was always in a buoyant mood.

Furthermore, it dawned on me that writing practice is not merely preparation for IElTS, but an ideal way to learn English. In the process, I've strengthened my grasp of words and phrases that I superficially knew. For instance, by writing this essay, I've fully understood the usage of "to curve", "to wind", "to situate","to locate", "convergence","nor", etc. If I had not tried to use them myself, I would not have made the improvement in my English proficiency.

So Thank you for your kindness. You thoughtfulness is a gift I will always treasure. But you might well not be worried about my steam. I will be more enthusiastic and spirited to see my advance, in both IETLS preparation and broader English skills.

Home / Writing Feedback / The maps illustrate how Meadowside village and Fonton, which is a neighboring town - development