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Writing Ielts Task 2:The mass media have an adverse effect on moral standards.


DungVo 1 / -  
Aug 17, 2020   #1
The mass media have an adverse effect on moral standards. Do you agree or disagree?

Write an essay (at least 350 words) to give your opinion.



Answer:
There is an explosion in the popularity of mass media these days, leading to its broader influence both positive and negative. It is reckoned that the mass media have a devastating impact on moral principles. I am a strong advocate of this point of view, and this essay includes some reasons to support my stand.

For a start, children's morals are inclined to be injuriously affected by the media. Not only cannot they discern a huge amount of information, but they also have more spare time to access that. If they usually watch videos containing degrading language without being censored, they may consider them to be normal in real life. For example, my brother often spends his free time on nonsense videos in which the editors use improper language, which can negatively affect his diction when communicating with others.

Another notion worth mentioning is that the media also acts as a catalyst for deteriorating moral philosophy. Some people regard social sites as a place not for sharing, but for blaming or using hostile comments towards a person who they even have no knowledge of. Without a multi-faceted view, electronic media's users are easily willing to insult others based on yellow journalism. For instance, there are a host of attention-grabbing posts involving the break-up between Virus and his girlfriend; however, some groups of people not truly understanding their relationship are ready to comment hurtful or sensitive words to discuss or judge this matter on both sides while it's not their business at all.

By contrast, merely a small part of kindnesses are transferred through media outlets including television and newspaper. This raises people's awareness of lending a hand and reminds them of how to conduct themselves. Nevertheless, with a fast pace of life, the busier people are, the less time they spend on watching national broadcasters; instead, keeping up-to-date through online magazines is an optimal alternative. Therefore, we have to suffer from the deleterious effects of the media more than the benefits we can reap from.

In conclusion, children's moral and offensive comments are two above-mentioned detrimental outcomes of mass media. It is recommended that with the rapid development of social sites, we should be alert when getting exposure to these.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,397 4385  
Aug 17, 2020   #2
A Task 2 IELTS essay has a minimum 250 word count, not 350. The standard response format for an agree or disagree essay is only a 4 paragraph presentation composed of 2 reasoning paragraphs along with the prompt paraphrase and reverse paraphrase. You have over discussed this essay and also, not followed the correct discussion format as indicated by the presentation.

The paraphrase paragraph needs to provide a restatement only of the given discussion topic and a direct response to the question provided with an outline of the discussion reasons. It should not include information not present in the original presentation as it will alter the discussion format and content of the presentation. For this essay, the proper format would have been somewhat like this:

Measured principles are often said to be negatively affected by the broadcasting industry. I agree with this opinion based on two reasons. First... Second...

You do need to outline your discussion points, but you do not need to give an overview of your discussion. The main discussion should be found in the reasoning paragraphs, per topic. Additionally, since this is a simple agree or disagree essay, you should never use an extent response such as "I am a strong advocate of..."

Keep the discussion simple, clear, and concise. The most number of reasons for this opinion essay would be 2. That is because you are being tested on your ability to properly explain your point of view. Something that you should be able to prove within 40 minutes, using the 250-290 word limit. It is only an opinion paper, not a research paper. The length you wrote, 370 words, means that you wrote a research, rather than opinion paper.

In all honesty, I do not believe you would be able to write this many words during a pencil test. Perhaps you can do this during the CBT but at what cost? Based on the errors you made in the presentation, you neglected to review, revise, and finalize your errors in the areas of grammar, clarity and conciseness. Your conclusion offers a plan of action at the end, something that was not required by the original discussion. Expect to receive points deductions for including a discussion slant that is not included in the original presentation. You should only stick to giving an opinion based on the topic, do not give a possible solution where none is required.


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