Toefl Writing - What does it mean to be a good neighbor?

Toefl Writing - Neighbors

Neighbors are the people who live near us. In your opinion, what are the qualities of a good neighbor? Use specific details and examples in your answer.

It is disputable what the qualities of a good neighbor they are. Depending on one's background and personal experiences, one's perspective on this issue can significantly differ. That being said, in my opinion, I advocate that being considerate and keeping community rule are the requisites of a good neighbor.

To begin with, it is important for neighbors to be considerate of their neighbors. To be specific, a person who consider how one's action affect others is a good neighbor. For example, my personal experience can be used to validate the claim above. A few months ago, my neighbor who lives the upstairs visited my house to ask for permission to use the washing machine at 11 pm on the day. I didn't mind it because I had to do my homework till late at night but I was appreciated for him to seek permission before doing that. As a result, I think considerate person is a good neighbor.

Furthermore, keeping community rule is also essential requirement for good neighbor. In particular, A person who follows the rules well do not make his neighbors uncomfortable. Take my own experience, for instance. In my community, the day when throwing away the food trash is fixed but last summer, a person often throws away the food trash irregularly and the trash which is not picked up for long time smelled bad. Consequently, following the rule is very critical for a good neighbor.

In conclusion, I am highly convinced that being thoughtful and keeping the rules are the important qualities of a good neighbor for the two crucial reasons mentioned above.

please help my toefl writing,,,

@pitheson
Hello there. Seeing as you are new here, welcome to the forum! I hope you find this feedback beneficial for your learning endeavors.

To begin with, I think that the introductory portions of your text can still be improved. If you try to not overexplain, you'll be able to curate shorter and yet more meaningful content because you'll be able to focus on what's essential for your text.

While having transition words are alright, try your best to not saturate your content too much with them. For instance, in your second paragraph's second line, you could have opted to remove the words "to be specific" to assist in ensuring that you deliver in a straightforward manner.

Be cautious of the structure as well of your sentences. Note that you need to incorporate appropriate punctuation to create dynamic pauses.