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mobile phones is destroying social interaction. Do you agree? IELTS GT essay



usalma2002 9 / 21  
Feb 16, 2010   #1
Some people sat that technology such as mobile phones (cell phones) is destroying social interaction. Do you agree or disagree?

Due to the contribution of technology, like other electronic devices, mobile phone has penetrated in our daily lives. Application of mobile phone is such a topic that seems to provoke a lot of debate in people- those who support it and those who advice us against it. Thereby the industry is booming and there does not seem to be any shortage of opening new mobile phone outlets, so it can not be all bad.

Some people may think because of increasing uses of cell phones, people are getting habituated to keep contact with friends and relatives only by this mode of communication rather than visiting each other. People only use hand phone for all purposes, for instance, to say hello, to express greeting, sympathy, condole, grief, request, complain, order by merely sending a short message or talking one or two minutes over phone. Thus our feelings are being rusted. In addition, it is said that youngsters are engrossed with hand phone to share message, music, video, memory card, voice chat, voice mail among themselves neglecting their studies, avoiding elders around them, even they do not like to see elder relatives when they are at stake.

On the contrary, people who favor mobile phone possess quite positive view. They tend to say that, over last half century, the pace of change in human lives have increased beyond our wildest expectations. With other electronic devices, mobile phone has penetrated in our everyday life style. Now swift pace of life and hectic schedule pushes people to be busy at any time. To constantly adopt to keep pace with it, hand phone seems like a Godsend. Various options of mobile sets allow one to be connected with all around him, even with long lost friends, neighbors. Inside hand set we can save contact number and can get informed if someone calls when the set is switched off too. So no one is beyond reach over very long distances. Internet browsing, email checking options through cell phone also have made our life easier and one can get latest news of any member over a second of time within his social circle.

To recapitulate, mobile phone has become a modern way of life that keeps us closer. At present even people can go for a social gathering keeping their business work unhampered.

essayvision - / 8  
Feb 16, 2010   #2
Hi Umme,

I like how you write both pros and cons of having such technology and argue both sides. However, after reading your essay, I am not entirely convinced if your pros of having this technology weighs more than your cons. In addition, I think you can make it more clear in your introduction and conclusion, what your stand is between the two sides and make it feel more "confident" that this technology is indeed something that brings value to our society.

David
cathyliu 19 / 53  
Feb 16, 2010   #3
"Due to the contribution of technology, like other electronic devices, mobile phone has penetrated in our daily lives. Application of mobile phone is such a topic that seems to provoke a lot of debate in people- those who support it and those who advice us against it. Thereby the industry is booming and there does not seem to be any shortage of opening new mobile phone outlets, so it can not be all bad."

I consider the first sentence is rather excellent. the words such as electronic devices, penetrate are quite impressive. However, I personally believe it will be better if you show a clear/legible personal opinion .

I also try to rewrite your first paragraph

Due to the contribution of technology, mobile phones have penetrated into our daily life. However, their extensive application has provoked plenty of debates about their influence. Some people argue that they are destroying the social interaction. while other .... Personally, I tend to /believe/think its influence is not all bad.


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