Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 5


IELTS Task 2- Modern buildings vs traditional buildings



rachelaska 1 / 1  
Mar 22, 2014   #1
Modern buildings are appearing in large numbers, some people believe that we should build our buildings in traditional styles.

To what extend do you agree or disagree?



Nowadays, there are increasing number of modern buildings to meet different needs of office workers and residents. Modern buildings, as one of the most important urban architecture, is playing a significant role in the society from different aspects. However, some people argue that we should erect buildings in traditional ways as they represent culture. From my point of view, modern architectures should be built; on the other hand, people should not build buildings in traditional style but to preserve the historical buildings.

Modern buildings are crucial from a number of aspects. First of all, with the growing number of residences and limited land resources in metropolitan cities, modern buildings provide more accommodation to city dwellers. In big cities like New York, Sydney and Beijing, as they provide more job opportunities, people around the countries all move to these cities. As a result, there is great demand of housing and modern apartments with 30 storeys are able to meet the needs. Likewise, a number of multinational companies have their head office in big cities and they take up huge amount of space. It is more appropriate for these companies to have offices in modern buildings with good facilities. Additionally, as skyscrapers represent the ability in architect, developed countries aim at erecting the tallest building in the world to win the national pride. It is always reported in the newspaper that Dubai is building the most luxurious modern building in the world while Japan has the tallest tower. Modern buildings are very important in the society.

On the other hand, some argue that we should build traditional buildings because modern architectures are the same and buildings should be characteristic. I believe it is better for us to preserve the old buildings than to build new ones that are similar to the old. First of all, it is impossible to build architectures exactly the same as before because some of the raw materials are not available now. For instance, Chinese building used red bricks a lot in the past, as the production process of red bricks does great harm to the environment, government bans the use of red bricks in construction. Also, historical buildings cannot be rebuilt, as a result, government should spare more effort to protect the old blocks as they are valuable education resources and students can learn the traditional styles based on that.

In conclusion, modern architectures are important for the sake of human beings and the techniques in building will be developed continually. Moreover, conventional buildings should be protected by government.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Mar 22, 2014   #2
First I have an admin request from you; You should have opened this thread in the Writing Feedback forum. Yourthread has been moved from Essays Term papers to Writing Feedback.

Nowadays, there are increasing number of modern buildings to meet different needs of office workers and residentsmodern work environments and life styles.
Modern buildings, asbeing one of the most important aspect of urban architecture, isare playing a significant role in the society from different aspectsperspectives.
Misnariah Idrus 19 / 35  
Mar 22, 2014   #3
(1)
"Modern buildings , as one of the most important urban architecture, is playing a significant role in the society from different aspects."

modern buildings: plural
one of : singular
is playing: singular

(2)
Dubai is building the most luxurious modern building

there is a repetition of 'building' usage, you should find out its synonym and change one of them

(3)
"Moreover, conventional buildings sho...."

I think, 'moreover' should replace with 'furthermore', as the group words following it do not inform additional reasons, but just additional suggestion
Pahan 1 / 1824  
Mar 23, 2014   #4
Your essay seem to be pretty long. I wonder whether you were able to handle time well.
crystal941 6 / 10  
Mar 23, 2014   #5
Nowadays, there are increasing number of modern buildings to meet different needs of office workers and residents. Modern buildings, as one of the most important urban architecture, is playing a significant role in the society from different aspects. However, some people argue that we should erect buildings in traditional ways as they represent culture. From my point of view, modern architectures should be built; on the other hand, people should not build buildings in traditional style but to preserve the historical buildings.

Nowadays, there are increasing number of modern buildings to meet different needs of office workers and residents. Modern buildings, as one of the most important urban architecture, is playing a significant role in the society from different aspects.However, some people argue that we should erect buildings in traditional ways. as they represent culture.From my point of view, However, I believe that modern architectures should be built instead. on the other hand, people should not build buildings in traditional style but to preserve the historical buildings.

I think this would make your introduction clearer. :)


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2- Modern buildings vs traditional buildings
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳