Task 2: It would be necessary for parents to attend a parenting training course to learn

It would be necessary for parents to attend a parenting training course to learn how to bring children up.

Do you agree or disagree?

In light of the innovative world, the personal advancement of children is an issue that governments in some countries keep an eye on. Many people argue that parents compulsorily involve in a training course about being parents to nurture their kids well. From my perspective, I strongly agree with this state of view.

First and foremost, It has to be admitted that children's training courses are helpful to some extent in raising parents' awareness of children's health problems. A child who is under five years old easily gets sick because they do not have enough original prevention from harmful factors such as bacteria or viruses. Apprehending more knowledge about childcare, parents would be more confident in caring for children when some troubles happen. This approach also reduces their financial resources and time since they can deal with minor problems. In some circumstances, it is necessary for parents to be able to implement first-aid treatment in an emergency situation. For example, when a child can not breathe due to an airway foreign body, we have to do Heimlich immediately.

Secondly, parents joining childcare courses would be trained to teach their kids essential and social skills. Children are sensible and fragile. For example, they do not aware of what wrong they are doing when they make some mistakes and even imitate some dangerous actions. It is required to comprehend their mentality and make sure that they can avoid social evil in the future. Learning how to attitude and treat them is crucial for parents, which leads to better development in both the physical and mental side of a child.

In conclusion, giving access to childcare education to parents need more resources and concentration because of the huge advantages that courses bring. Although it is difficult to encourage all families to participate in this strategy, I believe it should be adopted widely.

The preliminary TA consideration for this essay will automatically be a failing one for 2 reasons. The first, is that it is an inaccurate representation / restatement of the original prompt. The reference to the government and an argument implication are both not present in the original discussion presentation. Therefore, the rewriting is inaccurate, as well as, incorrect. The writer's opinion is also in the incorrect format owing to how the writer uses an extent response when the requirement is a simple agree or disagree opinion. The essay will receive a failing preliminary score at this point.

Added to the scoring problems are the incorrect use of punctuation marks such as the apostrophe, improper word references such as "apprehending", which is used out of meaning and context, and the confusing sentence ideas owing to the lack of proper idea development per paragraph. There are too many ideas, but not enough idea development in each paragraph.

Based on these mistakes, the essay will not achieve a passing score. There are too many serious deductions that will be applied to the final score.