Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

IELTS; Paid work by children - Is it wrong?

gollu 3 / 3  
Feb 3, 2014   #1
In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility.

What are your opinions on this?

Several advanced countries inhabitants believe children should be engaged in certain type of paid work to flourish their mental and physical strength moreover, to improve their knowledge's and skills. However, today it is a controversial topic whether children ought to toil or not. But, I personally presume at certain age children should work and enhance their abilities for their better future development.

Firstly, many developed country's schools provides some especial type of courses for children under the age of 12 to 15; such as babysitting, helping mothers in the kitchen, housework and grocery shopping . All this responsible work helps teenagers to learn or take the responsibilities. Therefore, they will learn some life experience and skills which make them mature and aids to deal with many unusual situations. Additionally, they will also understand the value of money and able to organize it in a better way. For example, at grocery shopping they can learn how to make savings. Meantime, they also know their parents hardship for instant, in babysitting courses, teacher will teach them how to handle their younger siblings, which is very beneficial for both of them in the future. These types of small duties help them to be dependable.

Secondly, if young children take casual works like working at Mc Donald's or café shops as a server then it will definitely help them to establish the leadership and also remove the barrier of communication in the society. Moreover, they can deal with everybody ineluctably and comprehend the real changes, for example, how to deal with the customer, how to calculate money and keep an eye on goods etc all this type of work make them liable. Additionally, work also makes them punctual.

However, other people deem young children under the age of 12 to 15 aren't reliable to take the responsibility for dull work. In addition, they claim children mental and physical capacity are not much develop to derive the hard working tasks. Moreover, these tasks will directly affects on their studies and make them feeble in their educational areas. Likewise, certain people argue that children will be more money seduced and neglects their study for earning money or be exploited by the employers.

In conclusion, if the parents or school teachers guide children how to manage their time while doing outdoor work, then inevitably they will acquire more appropriate life style with maturity and be responsible in the community. Therefore, work is significant for children for ameliorate future success.

Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Feb 3, 2014   #2
Several advanced countries inhabitants believe children should be engaged in certain type of paid work to flourish their mental and physical strength moreover

First, your prompt doesn't specifically say that this is an issue prevails in advanced countries. So you shouldn't have introduced your topic with a different sense to the reader. Also, "inhabitants" is not an appropriate word for the above idea. Lots of students have the tendency to replace words with synonyms, but that is a pretty dangerous thing to do if you are not very sure of the right usage of such words.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Feb 4, 2014   #3
Several advanced countries inhabitants believe children

I observe many students use synonyms without having a proper knowledge on their right usage. This is very dangerous thing to do, especially in IELTS and TOEFL tasks. Do not replace every word with synonyms as they may give a total different meaning if not used in the inappropriate places. For example, smile and laugh both have similar meanings, but used to express very different situations. Smile is a polite gesture while Laugh can be very sarcastic at times.

Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS; Paid work by children - Is it wrong?