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Some people believe that owning a home is more important than renting one.


cecilisabella 1 / -  
Mar 14, 2021   #1
[IELTS CAM 15 TASK 2 TEST 1]:

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.


Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In some countries, people believe that owning a home is more important than renting one. In my opinion, this is a positive situation and there are a myriad of reasons why they get this idea.

Firstly, homeowners have their own rules so they do not need to follow any other's rules. For instance, if people choose to rent a home, they would have to follow the rules of owner such as do not come home late especially after 10 pm, do not make noisy at late night, etc. Because of these rules, sometimes renters could feel uncomfortable and even they would get stressful when they want to relax but there are some restrictions that they have to comply with. In contrast, homeowners could do anything they want.

Secondly, people who owner home has the stability. They almost do not have to move to other area except the government have an announcement about constructing some new projects. With renter, they usually have to move to another place if their owner get personal problems such as they do not want to let out their house to anyone because they have planned to do business.

In conclusion, people have a choice for owning a home because they have realised what value that a stable home could bring to them: convenience and stabilty. Sometimes, owning a home is not easy for who do not get enough money for payment so renting a home might be a better choice.

P/s: I've started learning IELTS writing exam so I looking forward to receiving all your comments and I'm so thankful for that.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,535 3447  
Mar 15, 2021   #2
Your essay will start off with a failing TA score due to percentage points deductions. You have written only 244 words out of the minimum 250. The target word count for a decent score should be anywhere from 275-300 words. When you write less than the minimum word count, it is almost certain that your essay will fail as you will have point deductions in the TA section for both the lacking word count and, the cut and paste reference to the topic discussion presented in the paragraph. These will weigh down your score heavily, even if you gave a partially correct response to the discussion presentation. You failed to give the topic outline as a part of your thesis statement. Rather than myriad reasons, you should have indicated 2 reasons that you will be discussing in the reasoning paragraphs instead. There are LR issues related to proper word usage and representation. These may have an effect on your GRA score due to the confusion that it could pose to some readers.
juliachung 3 / 10  
Mar 18, 2021   #3
Hi friend, firstly, I believe to get a higher band, your introduction should be paraphrased, not copied from the question. Also, there should be an outline in your introduction to have a brief about what your readers are going to read in the body.

Secondly, I think what the question wants to ask is why IN SOME COUNTRIES, owing a home is more important than renting one. Maybe the reason why you don't meet the required word count is because you missed that point. You can give examples about some countries that the citizens prioritize having their own home more than renting it and explain why. Good luck!


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