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Some people believe that sport is an essential part of school life for children, but others disagree



Huynhgiao 1 / -  
Nov 2, 2021   #1

Sports in schools for children



It is thought that sport plays a more important role in the educational environment, whereas, there is some claim that sport should not be a compulsory subject. I agree with the latter statement and the following essay takes a look at both sides of the argument.

To begin with, by playing a kind of sport, student's time would be more efficient. This leads to getting higher levels of learning results and grades. For example. Our brains are boosted while exercising, which might be helpful for long-term memories. Furthermore, participating in physical activities might prevent depression that most youngsters get from toxic social media. It is clear that considering sport as a compulsory subject is essential.

However, this line of reasoning is not sound because it wastes time doing sport as time might be more efficient in academic performance. Instead of joining in these un-worth activities, students would invest in practicing or studying, and then achieve better learning prospects that all of the students aim to. One of my classmates is a practical example. Although he plays football well, he achieves lower test scores than his peers because of not having enough time for education then neglecting his studies. In addition, physical exercise in educational programs has some strenuous exercises that are not suitable for those who have weak health. it is undeniable that sport should be remarked as a compulsory subject in education.

In short, although playing sport is a benefit for the mental as well as the physical development, I would argue that it is better if students are taught how to manage time, avoiding neglecting their academic

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15385  
Nov 3, 2021   #2
The writer shall only recieve a score for the personal opinion statement The essay is going to be considered for a failing score due to the lack of public opinion explanation and consideration. The essay does not have any seperation references that indicate the public opinion discussion as opposed to the personal opinion. something that is accomplished through the use of third person pronouns (as representative of the public opinion) and first person references ( for the personal opinion).

Always refer to the discussion format requirement Review the essay after drafting it. Make sure that you clearly seperate the opinions as required. This is the only essay type that will ask you to compare 3 opinions instead of only 1 as usually indicated by the prompts.
Emperor Penguin 3 / 9  
Nov 4, 2021   #3
@Huynhgiao

Body Paragraph 1: 'student's time would be more efficient'
I think this is not a proper main point, because your supporting points mention nothing about time. This should be changed to 'Playing sports helps to improve learning results and grades'. Then your explanation for this would be 'This is because our brains are boosted...'.

Hope this could help!


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