People have different views about what young individuals should do when they leave high school.

TOPIC: SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT STUDYING AT UNIVERSITY OR COLLEGE IS THE BEST ROUTE TO A SUCCESSFUL CAREER, WHILE OTHERS BELIEVE THAT IT IS BETTER TO GET A JOB STRAIGHT AFTER SCHOOL. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

a college or university or straight to work?

People have different views about what young individuals should do when they leave high school. While there are some clear benefits to youngsters who decide to get a job straight after school, I would argue that it is much more beneficial to go to college or university.

On the one hand, the decision to get a job straight after school is attractive for some reasons. Firstly, young people who want to get a job as soon as possible will be more independent in finance. This allows them to afford their living cost such as accommodation fees and food prices. As a result, they help to reduce financial burden on their parents. Secondly, those who start career at early ages would accumulate more practical experience as well as enhance essential skills which contribute to their chosen profession. Therefore, higher chance for them getting promotion quickly.

On the other hand, I believe that the option to pursue higher education is greater beneficial. Firstly, because some professions such as doctor and scientist require profound theoretical knowledge, young individuals might find themselves in the struggle of getting these jobs without graduating from college or university. Additionally, there is an increasingly significant competition in job market nowadays, many employers might give priority to candidates who have higher academic background, which allows university graduates have countless opportunities when they find job.

In conclusion, while it is true that getting job straight after school has some advantages, it seems to me that students have much more opportunities in career path if they continue higher education.

Hi, I think you have addressed the prompt pretty well, here are some specific suggestions:

the decision to get a job straight after school {try to avoid repeating phrases like "straight after school" - you could mix it up by saying "immediately after high school graduation" for instance}

is attractive for some reasons. {"for some reason" means you don't really know the particular reason - "She doesn't seem to like my dress for some reason." So I would avoid saying "for some reasons" because it sounds so similar}

as soon as possible will be more financially independent in finance.

their living costs such as accommodation fees {"accommodation fees" sounds odd and unnatural - I would probably just say "rent"}

they help to reduce the financial burden

those who start a career ...
Therefore, there will be a higher chance of them getting promotions quickly.

option to pursue higher education is of greater benefit. {or "is more beneficial"}

... in the struggle of getting {"struggling to get these" is more natural} these jobs

significant competition in the job market nowadays, thus many employers

priority to candidates who havea more extensive academic background, which allows university graduates to have countless opportunities in finding a job.

while it is true that getting a job

have much more opportunities intheir career paths if they continue higher education.

@TJLuschen
Thank you very much for your detailed correction.
i realize that i have problem with the usage of "the/a/an". However, i am not really clear about this sentence "this option to pursue higher education is ofgreater benefit. {or "is more beneficial"} --> why do we put "of" here? could you explain more about this grammar? many thanks.

Hi Thaoduyen, I think the best way is to treat it like an idiom. It cannot be used with every adjective, but here are some examples where it works:

to be of use = to be useful
to be of help = to be helpful
be of aid = to provide aid
be of service = to provide service
to be of importance = to be important
to be of significance = to be significant
to be of consequence = to be consequential
to be of interest = to be interesting
to be of benefit = to be beneficial
to be of assistance = to be helpful
to be of worth = to be valuable
to be of good quality = to be good with respect to quality

Hi Chen, it is really useful for me, I am most grateful. Thanks a million for this.