Most people are not as fit and active, as they were in the past. Problems and solution

being in good shape today

In these days, fitness has aroused people's discussion. Although the problems associated with the situation can be pronounced, they are not without feasible solutions.

Not being fit and active is certain to trigger undesirable problems in the modern ages and people almost feel uncomfortable with their body condition. In fact, people are busy with their work, home caring so they will lack of time to do more exercise. Moreover, junk foods and drinks tend to make people have unhealthy balance in their life. Consequently, they will have inadequate nutrition to provide for them day after day and they become unfit and inactive. Thus, nowadays, most people are not as vigorous as the people living actively and healthily in the past.

Notwithstanding, the problems above can be remedied, provide that some of following preparatory steps are taken. First, people ought to manage their spare time to do more exercise to maintain their superb health. Good condition can help them to prevent from coming down with lots of common diseases such as cough, sore throat or even fever, etc. Second, in lieu of eating fast foods at office, people had better prepare their meals every day, therefore, they can absorb enough nutrition for the body. Last but not least, not staying up late and get approximately 8 hours of sleep a night play a crucial role in helping people active and fit. Additionally, good sleep are capable of ease completely tiredness.

In conclusion, being in good shape has some holistic approaches should be adopted .Only when people endeavor get over this perspective can this issue be remedied thoroughly.

Good condition can help them to prevent from coming down with lots of common diseases such as cough, sore throat or even fever, etc.
->please change "coming down" to "being down".
"...not staying up late" can be changed to "sleeping early"- reduces word count and makes your essay crisp.
Just try to word your essay a bit better.
Cheers :)

Your prompt paraphrase is incomplete and lacking one sentence to complete a paragraph. You have not indicated the discussion requirement in your prompt paraphrase, which was supposed to represent the transition sentence for your discussion paragraphs. I wish you had tried to write at least 300 words for this essay. You actually did a good job in representing the prompt requirements with one exception. There was a lack of transition sentences within the paragraph presentations that would have shown the connection between reason 1 and reason 2. Since the 2 reasons are mentioned in one paragraph, there must be a connecting sentence that will highlight how the busy lifestyle of people leads to eating junk food, which in turn, result in the people not being fit and active. You could have said something like:

The people today are busy doing their jobs which keep them behind a desk for most of the day. The work requirements also lead them to choose fast food over fresh food. The combination of these 2 factors have prevented people from having time to exercise. The lack of time to get to the gym to exercise or to cook fresh food has resulted in their inactivity and lack of fitness. That said, there are some possible solutions to these problems.

While you show that you somehow understood the prompt and did your best to address the instructions, the lack of clarity and sentence development (via explanations) are what hindered this essay. Please try to explain yourself better next time. You don't need to use advanced English words. You can use simple vocabulary and still manage to get a better overall score due to the clarity of your explanations.