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IELTS 2- Some people think that Twitter, Facebook and similar sites have a big negative impact



natashaebab 3 / 9  
Dec 25, 2017   #1
IELTS WRITING TASK 2

Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

social media influence on people



In this generation using social networking sites have been part of our daily lives. It has positive and negative effects at the same time. Still it depends on how they are being used for us that what kind of effects we should get from this existing forms of media. In my humble opinion, I disagree that it has huge negative impact on both individuals and society.

I am not into an idea that social media have a huge negative effect to us. Actually, these have been very useful since they exist. We could use an application as a term of communication if we want to talk to our relatives anytime and anywhere. In addition, social media such as Facebook, Intagram and Twitter, have been very effective in spreading news updates and interesting articles. Also, I noticed some of us make used social media to grow businesses like online selling and purchasing. Personally, I find it more advantageous in my daily life. As well as, society could benefit from it depending on how it is being utilized.

Sometimes social media are abused by some us. Cyberbullying through internet is one of the examples. We cannot deny that some of us have experienced it. Moreover, spreading fake news could directly affect the society if the netizens keep on believing and sharing all of these. Another concern was, many of us considered scrolling social media as part of their normal life to the point that it takes much of their time of the day.

Taking all into considerations, I disagree with the fact that social networking sites have a huge negative impact. It is a matter of using them in the right way so us to have a positive effect on us and in our society

Thank you guys for your assessments: ).

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Dec 25, 2017   #2
bobbie, your essay falls short of the required elements of an effective IELTS Task 2 essay. This is always a 5 paragraph essay composed of the following representations:

1. Opening paraphrase
2. Reason 1 with supporting example
3. Reason 2 with supporting example
4. Reasons 3 or personal opinion (whichever is required by the discussion instruction)
5. Concluding summary

All of these essays are composed of a minimum of 3 sentences, maximum of 5 sentences. Each paragraph must contain only one fully developed explanation. That is why you have 3 body paragraphs with which to discuss your reasons and opinions. Do not go over 5 sentences with 1 topic per paragraph because that will result in an incoherent and non-cohesive paragraph presentation which will definitely lower your score.

Going back to the opening paraphrase. You must familiarize yourself with the way this is written as well. You need to rephrase the original prompt in your own words with a thesis sentence that responds to the discussion instruction. In this essay, the discussion instruction is for an "emotional" essay so a simple agreement is not the type of response you should be giving. The "emotional" essay relies on a degree of agreement or disagreement represented by the terms fully, partially, strongly, completely, and other similar terms.

By the way, please do not post a short cut version of the prompt requirements when you post your next essay. I need the complete prompt for the review of your opening statement. In this instance, I can tell you that, even with the incomplete prompt, your presentation will get an extremely low task accuracy score because you began discussing the essay in the opening statement, which is a no-no in a Task 2 essay due to discussion development issues. The opening paraphrase is exactly that. Do not try to discuss an opinion there because of the limited sentence count. A more appropriate representation is :

There is a growing negative belief regarding the impact of social networking sites on the common public these days. It is said that these virtual places have an unfavorable influence upon society. I am in strong disagreement with that statement and I will explain the reasons I oppose this statement below.

In the opening paraphrase, you need to explain the original prompt content and discussion instruction in your own words, using enough original words to help boost your LR score immediately. If you do not do a good job in the TA section, you will find it difficult to pull up your scores in the other sections. Specially when you do not follow the proper discussion development format.
PeterBrown 16 / 25  
Dec 25, 2017   #3
... negative effects at the same time

... social media haves a huge negative effect to us

I think you should avoid using I or we, but you can use it in your examples bit.

... that it has a huge negative ...

... abused by some ofus.
OP natashaebab 3 / 9  
Dec 26, 2017   #4
@Holt
Thanks so much for the response. This will be very helpful in my next essay.


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