People at work; job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing

As most people spend a major part of their life adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.

Work life and personal life are the two key features for a person's wellbeing. These are the two aspects that are interdependent and a balance has to be maintained in order to have a healthy life. As the major part of the life of an individual is spent at workplace, it has a significant impact and plays a major role in the personal life too.

Firstly, if we pick any working day of an adult, the major portion of that day would have been spent with his official environment. As per our government rule, a person should work on an average for at least 40 hours per week or eight hours per day. The mind should tuned towards the other activities too i.e., before and after the job hours. But it is not an easy task for all individuals. The most of the aspects we do in our daily life always reflects how well we have done in the previous hours. In job, an individual will undergo immense compulsions form his superiors to get the task done. Moreover, Corporates are filled will politics and jealousy nature of individuals. Nowadays, job security is a major focus of an individual, which keeps ticking with time, due to the increasing competition from their peers and young generations. Mind is filled with all these thoughts making the life miserable.

So, if a person enjoys his work and his job routine without feeling stress and strain, by accomplishing his tasks and achieving rewards at regular intervals, that keeps the tempo of the person and motto and his aspirations to achieve greater heights will increase substantially. Thereby, his personal life will be filled with pleasure and will able to solve the things in all aspects. Thus, in conclusion I would say, job satisfaction plays a pivotal role in individual's life.

I made some revisions/
As most people spend a major part of their life adult life at work, because job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.

But it is not an easy task for all some individuals. It is wrong to decide for all!
Good essay! Good thoughts!

As most people spend a major part of their life adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. This first sentence is great as is. The "beacause" that someone added does not actually fit with what you are saying.Firstly , if we pick any working day of an adult,...

Moreover , Corporations are filled will politics and the jealous nature of many individuals.
Great job!

Thanks Susan! i want to know what could be the rating id this essay is presented in IELTS

Hi, The question has two parts: As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well being.

What factors contribute to job satisfaction?How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
The essay is good, your vocabulary and grammar is ok . But, I think you did not answer to the questions that are asked in the topic. For the first part, u should mainly focus on the elements that affect the job satisfaction. In fact the question is, what can be done in the workplaces to employees and workers feel satisfaction and happiness?. I believe there are several factors that must be considered: 1) workload should be appropriate, 2) reduction in the stress level, especially for the managerial works that have the highest level of anxiety, 3) It is shown that observation of correct place of hierarchy contribute to satisfaction, 4) improving the appropriateness of work responsibilities with respect to non-wok needs, 5)job security, 6) salary and income of workers is another factor that impact job satisfaction.

At the second part of the topic it is asked that "how realistic is ..", In fact, it is asked "is it possible to expect job satisfaction for all workers and employees with different levels?" In my opinion it is too difficult and complicated because each work has its own needs and increase in the workers' satisfaction requires the structure of work place to be changed. For this purpose, authorities should spend more money and time. Since the most imperative thing for employers is benefit, not their employees satisfaction, this policy would no be seemed practical.

Conclusion is also too short, and in conclusion u should reword the first paragraph.
I hope that the comments be useful
Regards
A. Zafari