Unanswered [11] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback % width Posts: 2

WRITING TASK 1 - the percentage of people living in Australia who were born in Asia, the UK,...

nhaatle 1 / -  
Jul 21, 2021   #1

statistics of people who lived in Australia

Given is the line chart illustrating the proportion of people who lived in Australia came from different parts of the world.
Overall, the figures for the total population in Australia and people born in Asia and Other increased between 1976 and 2011, while that of the UK experienced a decline.

A more detailed look at the provided graph reveals that the total demographics of people in Australia declined slightly from 23 to 20 percent, hitting the lowest point in 2001, but then rose significantly to 25 percent during 10 years later. The trend then followed the same pattern as the figures for Other. The number of Australian people born in Other area was approximately 11 percent in 1976 which was a slight fall, followed by a soar and reached a peak at 14 percent in 2006.

Starting at nearly 14 percent in 1976, the percentage of Australian people were born in the UK fell substantially to 5 percent in 2011, while the demographic figures of Australians of Asian descent saw a significant increase (from 3 percent in 1976 to its high of 15 percent in 2011) and the 1996s makes the point at which its figure overtook that for the UK, at 7.5 percent.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 11,252 3656  
Jul 22, 2021   #2
This is a pretty good presentation that falls within the requirements of a passing task 1 analysis report. The presentation pretty much covers the easily spotted percentages. The analysis focuses on both the highs and lows.The writer would have done well to analyze the criss crossing points in the presentation at least once for a totally comprehensive presentation. While the highs and lows are evident, the overlaps allow for a comparative presentation of equal points. Something that examiners tend to score melee on due to the more comprehensive report format. Avariation of the word percentage would have also been useful. Aside from the word itself and percentage sign, the terms proportion, rate and Matio would have been LR helpful.

Home / Writing Feedback / WRITING TASK 1 - the percentage of people living in Australia who were born in Asia, the UK,...