Topic:
Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible.
Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
The increasing booming of technology has benefited the convenience of working space of labourer, which results in the fact that there has been a massive shift from on-site working to working from home among adults and the rising popularity of virtual classes with children. In my opinion, I believe that the negative influences of this practice are more glaring.
On the one hand, there is no denying that human has reaped tremendous benefits from the techonological development. First, virtual working and studying is cost-efficient thanks to the rapid accessible to the internet. In fact, parents and their children could exclude the fees related to commute, meals from their daliy expenses. What's more, adults are likely to have more quality time for their family and close monitoring to their children learning because there is no such time constraints and office boundaries as brick-and-mortar working.
On the other hand, given the social skills and interpersonal interaction, this trend has more concerns than we expected. Teenagers only receive full development on mental and physical sides when they are allowed to engage in the social activities and face-to-face meeting with friends and teachers instead of sitting in front of the screen and making interaction through headphones and videos. Similarly, the lack of direct communication with colleagues may lead to the low efficiency of work and worsening of social relationship and collective spirit which are believed the vital factors for the employee's career ladder. Therefore, human beings can not hide behind the web-based classes and offices to optimize the qualities of their life.
In summary, although the rapid growth of Internet has pervaded the working and studying aspects with a tons of advantages, the threatening of its downsides is far more weighted.Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,844 
4785 The prompt restatement is too wordy to the point where it is difficult to assess what you are really trying to say in the restatement. So you will lose points for clarity in that part. As for your opinion, it is properly presented so that will offset the deductions in the first part. However, the essay will still be given a low to non passing score since you did not fully develop your opinion over 2 paragraphs. As only the last reason relates to your opinion, that is the only reasoning paragraph to be scored. No points can be awarded for paragraphs that do not meet the supporting requirement for your opinion. This is a single opinion defense essay so you made a mistake in your response format. You did not fully explain the basis of your opinion and as such, will not receive a passing score.
**Some grammar errors:
- techonological development. --> technological
- First, virtual working and studying is --> are (because "working and studying" seems plural).
- daliy expenses. --> daily (Unless you take exams on computers, bear in mind these typo errors)
- ... of their life. --> lives
- the rapid growth of Internet --> the Internet (they always go along with each other)
- with a tons of advantages --> a ton/ tons
In my opinion, your essay lacks of evidence or examples if you want to argue your opinion. Consider to add some reliable information about this topic because it can boost your statements as well as lengthen your essay (in case you are clueless conveying supporting details).
