IELTS Writing Task2 - Why ppl try to find out the history of their family? Positive trend?

family history researches are popular nowadays

In recent decades, more people are curios about the history of their family. Who were their ancestors? What did they do? These questions make them try to find out the root of their family.

Despite difficulties, there are several reasons why they do that. Firstly, a lot of people try to find their long-lost family member for a reunion. For instance, many people try to look for the location where their relatives, who joined in wars, were buried and bring back to the homeland to be with their ancestors. Secondly, some with a special first name like "Dao", they may want to know if their root related to the royalty or some celebrities. Thirdly, others want to find out the information of their relatives about some genetic diseases in the past.

With these reasons above, this can be considered as a positive development. People are anle to uphold the family traditions, prevent some diseases and so on. However, there is still a drawback. Some are obsessed with the past and forget the present and his or her future. Also, it costs a huge amount of money.

In conclusion, finding the history of the family is a good trend for the young to remember their ancestors. An author used to say: " The further you can look in the past, the further you can see in the future".

Phuong, I understand that this is your first time writing an IELTS Task 2 essay. Which is why you have some serious formatting and discussion mistakes in this essay. I take it that you are not attending review classes and are studying on your own right? It is pretty evident in the manner that the essay was written. Which is why I will opt to simply advice you regarding your mistakes at this point. I am expecting that after my explanations, you will show an improvement in your next practice essay presentation.

An opening statement needs to accurately rephrase the original prompt. You did not do that in this essay. The opinion that the tracing of the family history is a positive trend should have been the last part of the opening statement. It would have come after the restatement of the topic, discussion instructions, and opinion overview presentation. Since your essay does not follow this format, you can bet that you will not get a good score on this essay.

The body paragraph discussions are not accurately done either. That is because you mixed the discussion points required in the opening statement with the informative discussion paragraphs portion of the essay. You will be losing score considerations quite rapidly at this rate and will most likely get less than passing scores in the process.

I strongly suggest that you review other essays relating to the same topic in this forum so that you can familiarize yourself with the proper formatting and expected discussion when it comes to similar themes in the future. That would be the best way to prepare yourself for the discussion that this sort of prompt requires.

@Holt
Thank you for your help and suggestion.