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The preferred evening course that both males and females (various ages) have recently attended


sasariri 17 / 25  
Oct 2, 2016   #1
Writing Task 1 : The number men and women attending various evening course in 2009

The bar chart present the preferred evening course that the different genders were attended most recently while the pie chart compares the percentage of age of these course participants during 2009. At first glance, it is evident from the charts that participants who had age 50 or over attended more than other age range and language program was the most common attendance in one year compared than other course. Most of programs were dominated by women compared than men.

To begin, the proportion of participants age 50 over who had age 50 or over was much greater than the four arrest age group. Most a half, 42% were attended compared to only 5 % for age under 20 who had the lowest proportion attendance. At the second place, age 40-49 had percentages less than one-third while the arrest age group were around 11-16%.

Turning to the kind of course for the most recent participants, there were some clear differences between man and women. Women were as likely to be attended for drama and language evening course than men at 10 and 20 people, 20 and 40 people. The painting class were also slightly higher for women by 5 people. The number of women and men who attended language class had different significant by 20 people. For both of sexes, language program was the highest attendance at 60 people when the painting class was fairly similar at approximately 5 people whereas the sculpture class represented a quarter from language attendance. Interestingly, different with other program, most of people who attended sculpture class were men, while the number of women were a half from women.



ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Oct 2, 2016   #2
Hi Sari,

The detailed descriptions below are my analysis towards your report summary of IELTS task 1. I hope you can follow through.

1st paragraph:
- The bar chart presentpresentsthe preferred evening course that thedifferentboth males and femalesgendershave recentlywere attended most recently while the pie (...) of age of these coursecourses participants duringin 2009.

- ... that participants who had ageaged 50 or over attended more than other age rangethe other age groups and language program was the program which had the most common (...) compared than the other courses .

- Most of programs were dominated by women compared than men.

2nd paragraph:
- To begin with , the proportion of participants aged 50 or over who had age 50 or over was much greater than the four arrestrest of age groups .

- Most a half, 42%Almost half percentage of participants were attended the course compared to only 5% (no need to give space for percentage symbol) for the age under 20 whothat had the lowest proportion of attendance.

- At the second place, people aged 40-49 had percentages lessless percentage than one third of the age group while the arrestrest age groups were around 11-16%.

Overall, I can see that your writing suffers from grammatical range and accuracy problem. This can be avoided by considering the above-mentioned feedback. Try to be more careful in the next practice. Good luck :)


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