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(IELTS) pressure on students good or not?



ekekek 25 / 51  
Apr 14, 2011   #1
Pressure on school and university students is increasing and students are pushed to study hard when they are young. Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

It is easy to hear that students tend to complain that the excessive pressure they need to shoulder is entirely beyond their limitation. Even to the college students, the competitive atmosphere become stronger day by day rather than decrease gradually since they have been admitted to the prestigious universities.

This kind of phenomenon can be understandable as none of parents hope that their children are inferior to others, especially in study. Thus, the only effective way for parents to do is drive their children to study hard no matter how unwilling they are. Indeed, quite a few students around us gain a high score and credit in such circumstances, leading to successful future eventually. In other words, students' potential can be kindled under the mounting pressure. Without the pressure, students might not be able to achieve success and waste their precious time spent on playing as well.

In spite of this, the obvious drawbacks of pressure on students cannot be ignored. Yong as a child, their childhood are occupied by tons of books, which makes them become study machines rather than versatile youngsters. Additionally, once they feel tired on study and disobey what the parents said, it is hard to drive them back. Worse still, a few students lack communicative ability as all their time have been spent in reading books.

Overall, I take the view that pressure should be moderate. Otherwise, students would become bookworms who couldn't be called as human beings. Reasonable pressure, giving students' motivation, bring benefits outweigh drawbacks.(252)

Real Fog 5 / 26  
Apr 14, 2011   #2
...the competitive atmosphere is becoming stronger day by day rather than decreasing gradually since they have been admitted to the prestigious universities...
...gain a high score and credits in such circumstances...
...waste their precious time spent on playing (define it or change) as well...
...by tons of books, which makes them become...
...they feel tired onof studying and disobey what the parents saidsay ...
...have being spent on reading books...
...Reasonable pressure, giving students' motivation, brings benefits and outweighs the drawbacks...
sobin 12 / 24  
Apr 14, 2011   #3
hi
i read your essay. First of all, I'm not a person to correct ur essay gramatically. But,i think you need to concentrate to make sure ur intro sentence more powerfull than this..n the conclusion as well.

n i 've doubt about one sentence
Even to the college students, the competitive atmosphere become stronger day by day rather than decrease gradually since they have been admitted to the prestigious universities.

is that correct? i have doubt about the usage of comparitive form of a verb with the word rather than
i appreciate that u have achied your word limit..but need more practise
gud luck
findthetime 5 / 9  
Apr 15, 2011   #4
Yong as a child---Young

This kind of phenomenon is understandable

And I think you should answer the topic,whether it is positive effect in conclusion...

Hope it could help u :)
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Apr 16, 2011   #5
It is easy to hear that students tend Simplify:
Students complain that the excessive pressure they need to shoulder is entirely beyond their ability. limitation . Even to the college students, the competitive atmosphere become becomes stronger day by day rather than decreasing gradually, since they have been admitted to the prestigious universities.

"none of the"...
This kind of phenomenon can be understandable as none of the parents hope that their

Without the pressure, students might not be able to achieve success, because they will waste their precious time spent on playing as well.

Worse still, a few students lack communicative ability as all their time have been spent in reading books.----I like this idea, but it is a little unclear. "...because all their time has been...

Also... I think you mean to say that they lack interpersonal communication skills because all their time has been spent reading books.

:-)


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