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IELTS writing task 2. Problems caused by action movies and solutions.



HoangDuong049 1 / -  
Sep 9, 2020   #1

effects of violence in movies



Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced ?

With the development of the filmmaking industry, people raise the concern that the intense amount of aggression in films is the cause of a countless number of major social issues. This essay is going to address one of those problems and show people how to tackle it in particular and issues caused by violence displayed in film in general.

It is true that film makers have been doing their best to invent novel ways to make a scene look more glamour. Their methods involve technologies like CGI and method acting, but the most straightforward way to make a scene more palatable is to increase as much aggression as possible.

However, the pleasure of enjoying action movies can certainly lead to aggressive behavior among viewers. Findings from scientific researches illustrate that people, especially youngsters who are the most impressionable, have a tendency to imitate what is displayed on movies, which is, in this case, action-packed films. Since people now have more access to watching movies, the risk of themselves being exposed to scenes portraying acts of violence is dramatically higher. As a result, these violent actions are carried out in real life by viewers, who are mostly young and lacking in suitable guidance. A number of streetfights, school bullying and violence abuse is the consequence of the habit of intensively enjoying aggression showcased in films.

Some suggest that action movies should be banned, but this might cause producers to encounter serious financial problems and potentially start an argument, which only worsen things. To minimize the negative effect of violent acts portrayed in movies, I recommend that film should be given label based on their content. We should be aware of the set of labels for movies with different contents, for example G is for everyone, PG stands for: "Parental guidance", etc. to avoid unintentionally subjecting children and teenagers to unsuitable content.

The bottom line is that negative effects caused by intense violence in film are unavoidable and could lead to serious social problems such as bullying and fights. Until new ways to reduce those effects are figured out, the best people can do is to giving movies labels.

It's my pleasure to have you guys give comments on my work.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15386  
Sep 10, 2020   #2
Regardless of whether you are taking the CBT or pencil test, you cannot write 357 words perfectly within 40 minutes. You still need time to review, revise, edit, and finalize your presentation. You actually have spelling and grammar issues in the paper that you failed to detect and correct because of the undue fixation on the length, rather than quality of the essay. Longer essays mean that you will run out of time to spellcheck. Failing to spellcheck lowers your LR, C&C, ang GRA scores. All 3 scores are related in the overall consideration.

For the paraphrase, you have the opportunity to clearly tell the examiner what the problems are and what related solutions to reduce the problem could be. The direct topic outline will allow the examiner to see if you actually understood the task requirements or not. These questions are meant to assess your task accuracy, which you did not really do a good job at in this presentation. Present the discussion points, vagueness will not help your score.

The second semi-paragraph presentation is not needed. It does not help to move your discussion forward. It should not be a part of the discussion. Do not refer to any research. Use public knowledge and personal information. Use pronouns, not references. That is the discussion expectation. Your discussion paragraphs lack clarity, related topic sentences, and actual discussion progression. It is truly a long essay but, it is not an effective essay. It does not have a passing score potential.


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