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What are the problems caused by overreliance on private cars? How to tackle it?



Ilmi_03 47 / 67  
Nov 22, 2016   #1
More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation.
Describe some of the problems overreliance on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution.


It is argued that citizens are more conveniently travelling by their private cars. As the consequence, a number of problems appear, such as traffic congestion and air pollution, and those require effective measures immediately. One of the alternatives which can be taken into account is no one entering the city centre in certain times, in exception by using public transport.

The majority of people complain about cars hampering in the main street during peak hours every day. This is because those means inhibit residents from reaching their offices or schools on time. In my personal experience, I am always trapped in the road for hours with cohort of employees since the bus cannot run faster during the journey. As the result, frequently I come late to my first class in the morning.

The fact that overwhelming of private vehicles deteriorates global warming is undeniably true. Certainly, a car emits more emission, particularly carbon dioxide, than public transport. The long-term research of Harvard University reveals that one automobile releases ten tonnes CO2 per year, confirming that pollution resulted from private vehicles is the primary cause of global warming.

In my opinion, the government should restrict the number of owned cars in the road by introducing car free day. This attempt has been proven successful in several cities in the world. For instance, in Japan, after establishing that no car allowed travel to the city in Monday from 07.00 to 11.00 am, there has been a significant decline of gas emissions since 2010.

To sum up, I have a tendency to think that the more use of private cars, the more problems of congestion and global warming. Therefore, it is essential that the authorities cut off the number of those by establishing car free day.

RAY93 35 / 166  
Nov 22, 2016   #2
... taken into account is no oneprivate car/no one using their own car entering ......, in exception by usingfor public transportS / FOR THOSE USING PUBLIC TRANSPORTS .

It is argued ......... using public transport.

Apart from your well developed paragraph, you never emphasized or even mention that it is because the massive number of private cars, so you delivered a vague explanation in which readers should find by their selves the correlation of this paragraph with others or with the question given

The fact that AN overwhelming NUMBERof private vehicles deteriorates ......
Certainly, a PRIVATE/SELF-OWNED car emits more emission.......than public transport does.
This attemptS has been proven ......
... decline of gas emissions since 2010 [LOCALLY OR GLOBALLY? to give strong statement you should say is the benefits for Japan only or this local measurement has greatly affected the earth].

... that the authorities SHOULD cut off the number of those ...

*I glad to say that it is enjoyable to read your writing. You delivered such a well-development essay by also using some less or sophisticated vocabulary. However, please concern about my suggestion or correction and work through it as I hope these can help you to enhance your work. Good Luck


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