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PROBLEMS OF EDUCATION IN DEVELOPING COUNTRY



VK WSSH 8 / 3  
Sep 19, 2016   #1
There are many problems in developing country. One of the problem is in education field it cause most of child be at work in tender age, not many schools in a particular area, education is an important key for improving the economics of the country.

First, you have to know education problems in developing country it because of child have to work in green age. They have to help financial problems occurred in their family. There is no option for not working, they must to make money for daily needs.

Second, in developing country has problem of education it cause the lack of number of schools. It makes limitation of access to get an education. This is a serious problem in developing country because no equalization availability of schools at remote area.

Moreover, identic with my latest point, education is a necessary matters for regenerate economy in developing country. If a country wants to be more developed, it has to have a good human resources. Surely it has to start from education.

In conclusion, developing country still has problems of education in it. It such as children have to work in young age , there is no dissemination of schools, education is significant point to raise economics of developing country. Furthermore, we have to find a way out of all these problems.

abdasyari93 9 / 17  
Sep 19, 2016   #2
Hello @VK WSSH, I got some suggestions for your writing.

Here my advice:

1. One of the problem is ... >>> One of the problems is ... ( remember that "one of" should be followed by plural noun)

2. they must to make money for daily needs. >> they must make money for daily needs. ( must + V1) or you can say they have much money for daily needs.

3. Second, in developing country has problem of education it cause the lack of number of schools . >>
Second, developing country has a problem of education because it is caused by the lack of number of schools.
agungdanprakoso 5 / 4  
Sep 19, 2016   #3
Hallo @VK WSSH

could i give little bit correction for you.
here we go

1. it should be "One of the problemsis in education field it causeis most of childreenbe at work in tenderwho are exploited under age" ---> because if you want to utilize one of bla bla bla ... you have to put PRULAL on the end of sentence and it is more clearly

2. "sometime you make wrong spelling like "children" it should be "childreen"
3. it should be "education is a necessary matters for regeneration of economy.in developing country " because ---> you have to put NOUN after "of" and erase "in developing country" because it makes generalization essay.

thank you before.
Rinnegan45 - / 35  
Sep 19, 2016   #4
Hi there!
how's life treating you?

Here are some ideas which I hope would enlighten you.
1) One of the problemS is in education field"."(you need to end your sentence there before you continue making another sentence) it It causeS most of childREN"must" be at workING in tender age, not many schools are absence in a particular area, "and" education is an important ...(always end your parallel structure with AND, OR, ETC)

2) ... problems in developing country.itIt"is" because of childREN have to work in green age.

3) There is no option for not working,; they must to make money for daily needs. (never put "to" in front of modals)

4)Second, in developing country has problem of education.itItBE cause OF the lack of a number of schools.
... problem in developing country because "there is" no equalization availability of schools at such remote area.

5)Moreover, identicALwithto my latest last point,.E ducation is a necessary mattersforto regenerate economy ...

hope it will help
Jnur 5 / 8  
Sep 19, 2016   #5
Hii,. here my suggestion

- Second, in developing country has problem of education it cause the lack of number of schools.
You are likely missing an article; article help the reader know how many nouns that you referring to. So, you should put an article "has a problem of" and add -s "causes" (s-v agreement)

- I guess, there is spelling error with "identic" you can change it to "identical" or you can re-write your sentence to "Moreover, as mentioned before, ....... "
FirmanRomadhon20 9 / 12  
Sep 19, 2016   #6
hello VK WSSH, this is interesting essay, but I have some suggestions for you:

One of the problem is in education field. it causes (singular : subject v1 s/es) most of child to (this needs to add to infinitive) be at work in tenderyoung/ under (both those words are more appropriate to be used in this sentence) age, not many schools in a particular area, education is ...this sentence is not coherence, perhaps you mean; at this case, there are not any schools. That is the deporable condition,.

they must to"must" is enough without "to", except you use "have/has/had to" make money for
in developing country has problem of education, it causecauses (singular subject: v1 s/es) the lack of number of schools.

I think you should pay attention for subject-verb-agreement.

I hope it will help
mem77 62 / 93  
Sep 19, 2016   #7
Hello vkwssh, it was very nice information about problems in developing country and it gives us new knowledge about it. But, i have some correction within your essay to make it better and to make an improvisation within your skills on writing.

On your essay, I read that there are to many similar words. I think you have to change it with others sentence or you must paraphrase the sentence. You write "There are many problems in developing country. " I suggest you to change it with "In developing country, it has several problems within can not be solve for few times." to make your sentence more formal and good looking for the reader.

I think that's enough from me, and keep practice!


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