Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


a raise in the price of petrol is not the best solution to handle traffic and pollution problems



amrillahmk 29 / 31  
Nov 7, 2016   #1
Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
What other measures do you think might be effective?


It is assumed by raising the price of petrol would result in solving the growing issue of emission and traffic. In this case, I would argue that although petrol price is increased, it would not lead to tackling these problems. Instead, it would cause other problems such as the increasing cost of staple food and other public transportation. Other solutions, such as introducing the law to use public transportations and stopping illegal logging, should be taken into consideration.

Those who believe by increasing the price of petrol would terminate the problem of pollution and traffic are because they thought there would be a decrease in the use of private cars due to high price of fuel. If the fuel price is higher, then people do not want to use their cars and use public transportation instead.

In fact, an increase in petrol price will bring domino effects to other sectors, such as public transportation and the price of staple food in market. Taking Indonesia as an example, there was a raise in fuel in 2008, and it was followed by the increasing price of chili, onion, and meat in traditional market. In addition, the price of tickets for using public transportation also went up and people kept driving their cars on roads so that traffic and pollution issues still happen nowadays.

The examples that have been mentioned are tangible proof that increasing the price of petrol is not the best solution and other measures are needed. I believe in order to prevent emission and traffic problems, promoting the law to use public transportation and ceasing illegal logging problems will solve these issues. This is because if government changes the law, many people will switch to use public transportation instead of their private cars. The reinforcement law in illegal logging also makes illegal loggers think twice if they want to cut down the trees so that traffic and pollution issues can be handled.

To sum up, a raise in petrol will not solve the growing problem of traffic and pollution. In fact, it only creates new problems, so that other measures such as promoting law to use public transportation and stopping illegal logging would be more effective.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Nov 7, 2016   #2
Hi Miftah, you could possibly score a 6 on the scoring band with this essay. As I read the essay, I came to realize that you not only understood the prompt provided, but you also bothered to analyze the question in reference to possible solutions that you could provide. Therefore, it became evident that the person writing the essay has a somewhat advanced knowledge of the language. The person also has the ability to develop cohesive sentences, even though there may be problems with his word choices throughout the essay. These mistakes do not impede the discussion that you are presenting. Therefore, you have a very good chance of passing this particular section of the IELTS test. Try to focus more on developing your English vocabulary and practice developing simple sentences for your use in the practice tests. We need to show that your language use can increase to a point where you can score even higher in the practice tests which can translate to a higher rating in the actual test.


Home / Writing Feedback / a raise in the price of petrol is not the best solution to handle traffic and pollution problems
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳