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ESSAY - READING ENTERTAINMENT BOOKS INSTEAD OF EDUCATIONAL BOOKS - FEEDBACK


prince303 5 / 10  
May 25, 2010   #1
ome parents say that their children are wasting enough time on reading entertainment book. Children should spend their time on educational books. Give your opinion with examples.

If we are to compare the difference between the reading habits of today's students and that of 20 years ago, we can see stark differences. (can we use this line in context of this essay?). Nowadays, students prefer reading entertainment books such as harry potter, aladin and alice in wonderland. Many people argue that students should focus on educational books rather than wasting time on reading entertainment books. ( can we change this sentence, every time we say this line any better line?). However, I believe t should that students should read books that can entertain them, apart from reading their academic books. My opinion is based on several reasons.

To begin with, reading entertainment books improve the thinking capacity and language skills of students. Educational books at school are primarily focused on examination. Therefore, students tend to memorize the important texts from the books just for the sake of exams. Moreover, they find it really boring to go through whole books. In contrast, entertainment books let students to open up their imagination. Which allows them to enhance their creativity dramatically/immensely. In addition, famous characters and excellent stories hook the students to read each and every word in books. Consequently, they learn many new words and improve their reading skills.

It is quite amazing to know how a entertainment book distresses the students. Nowadays, students have packed timetables. School, sports and private coaching classes leave them with a boggling (any other word?) head. Entertainment books work as a stress buster for them. After a long tiring day, nothing is better than reading your favorite comic while lying on your couch. It relieve their mind from confusing calculas and heavy chemistry formulas. Which allows them to freshen up for the next hectic day.

In a nutshell, reading entertainemnt books provide many advantages for students. However, student should allocate time for reading such books and must not neglect their studies. With proper supervision, reading entertainment books are very beneficial for youngsters.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13,387 129  
May 26, 2010   #2
Capitalize the titles of books.

If we are to compare the difference between the reading habits of today's students and that of 20 years ago, we can see stark differences. (can we use this line in context of this essay?-- Yes! Eve though the essay is not about comparing modern reading to reading from 20 years ago, it is still a good introduction to your topic, and it helps you to make your point.). Nowadays, students prefer reading entertainment books such as ...

(can we change this sentence, every time we say this line any better line?)
I see that you asked about using a different word, because you don't want to repeat "entertainment books" in every line. How about this:

Many people argue that students should focus on educational books rather than wasting time on reading entertainment books seeking to be entertained.
or... wasting time on fiction.

:-)

I think you should replace this with a sentence that tells something specific about those reasons... or lists them.
My opinion is based on several reasons.


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