Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 4


The Reasons To Save Whales - whales are endangered animals and near extinction (Summary TED)



Faridadwi18 67 / 93  
Aug 22, 2016   #1
Right now, whale are endangered and near extinction because people hunt them and it is started from 200 years ago. People were hunted whale in order to take their meat, oil, or whale bones. In the '70s Save Whale Movement made a campaign to stop commercial of using whale to attract people and in early '80s this campaign had a successful result. Government banned to air a commercial whaling. Many people think that whale should be saved because of its charismatic and beautiful but actually whale is an ecosystem engineer which maintain stability and health of the ocean also provide services to human communities.

There are two main things of whales which help ecosystem, the poop and the corpse. Whale pump (poop) are contains of much essential nutrients to entire ecosystem. Whale carcasses provide a food to other fishes and help to delay global warming. When the corpse washed up in beaches it's provide feast to many species in land. People need to stop whaling and revise their thinking to save the whale not only for whale sake but also for human itself.

Link : ted.com/talks/asha_de_vos_why_you_should_care_about_whale_poo#t-90122

NinaJoesuf25 36 / 61  
Aug 22, 2016   #2
Hi Farida, let me give you some suggestion..

In this day and age, whales are endangered animals and near extinction. It is because people hunt them fiercely. Arguably, it started from 200 years ago and have hitherto happened. The reason why human chased those whales is that they will reap the benefit at gaining their meat, oil, or whales' bones. Needless to say, in the.... .. made a campaign commercial to stop using whale for.... ( maybe you can add the reason why here). Astonishingly, this campaign had a successful result in early '80s. .....Government banned to air a commercial whalingUnfortunately, I dont get what you mean here. ....... Many people argued that the whales should be saved due to its charismatic and beautiful. What is more, the fact that whale is an ecosystem engineer which maintain stability and health of the ocean also provide services to human communities.
ekalamarsyari11 72 / 101  
Aug 22, 2016   #3
hi ida

people hunt them and it is started from 200 years ago
people have hunted them since 200 years ago

because of its charismatic and beautiful you can change with ...

... engineer which maintains stability and health of the ocean also provides services to human communities.

Whale pump (poop) are contains ofmuchamount of essential nutrients to ...

let's study hard
justivy03 - / 2265  
Aug 22, 2016   #4
Hi Farida, below are my thoughts on your review;

- Right nowNowadays , whales are endangered
- and, it is started from 200 years ago.
- People were huntedhunting whales in order
- of usinguse of whale,
- to attract people and in early '80s this campaign had a successful result.
- Government banned to air a commercial whaling.
- Many people think that whales should be saved
- because of its charismatic and beautiful characteristics
- but actually a whale is an ecosystem engineer which maintain
- stability and health of the ocean and can also provide services ...

- There are two main things of whales whichways that Whales help the ecosystem,
- are contains of much essential nutrients to entirethat is necessary for a balanced ecosystem.
- Whale carcasses provide a food to other fishes
- and help to delay global warming.
- When the corpse washed up in beaches it'sit provide feast
- to many species in the land.
- People need to stop whalinghunting whales and revise their
- thinking to save the whales not only for whale sake but also for humansitself .

There you have it Farida, I hope the above remarks are helpful with your revision, for future writing reference, mind your minor details such as punctuation marks and the correct form of words, review the English language rules such as the subject verb agreement and proper use of tenses too.


Home / Writing Feedback / The Reasons To Save Whales - whales are endangered animals and near extinction (Summary TED)
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳