Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 4


What are the reasons for species being extinct ?



Furkan 3 / 4  
Nov 23, 2015   #1
Throughout history numerous species of animals and plants have faced with danger of extinction. While some of them were able to deal with this serious issue, the others could not resist and died out such as dinosaurs, mammoths and etc. Two main factors causing this problem are natural disaster and human being.

Firstly, the extinction danger is not only caused by humanity but also caused by natural diseases such as earth quakes, forest fire, lack of rain, extreme cold and high temperature (?). Most species need certain weather conditions to survive, if they cannot find suitable conditions, death becomes inevitable consequence. For instance, there was ice age on the earth thousands of years ago. According to the studies %90 of all species on earth disappeared at that time. However, in todays, wildfire would be one of the most dangerous way, because animals and plants living in that forest will be deprived of habitat even if they succeed to survive.

Second of all, there are some activities made by people which may endanger species such as hunting, air pollution, and destruction of habitats and so on. Valuable parts of the animals are the main reason for their being hunted. Generally elephants are hunted for their ivory, rhinos for their horns, deer and goats for their meats. Actually, balanced hunting may not cause for animals extinction; but, overhunting put animals' generation into danger (?). In addition, with the increase of the human population, need to place to settle increased, too. Then, people started to destroy species' habitats so as to create new settlement. In such a case, those plants and animals living in that habitat will no longer survive. Last but not least, air pollution is the another reason for being extinct. As a well-known a lot of organisms need fresh air to live. As long as human being keeps polluting air with carbondioxyde emission, those organisms will no longer survive.

To cut a long story short, both human being and natural diseases cause for species' being extinct. There is an undeniable fact that there is nothing to do about natural diseases; however, stopping some human activities can be the way to reduce amount of extinction.

vangiespen - / 4077  
Nov 23, 2015   #2
Furkan, in your thesis statement, you mentioned human beings as being the reason for the extinction of some animals and plants. While the dinosaurs and mammoths extinction can be explained by natural disasters, when you mention human beings, you need to use currently extinct or animals in danger of extinction in order to make that reason valid and acceptable.

extreme cold and high temperature (?)
- Simply saying "extreme temperatures will be fine. That is actually self explanatory already.

According to the studies %90 of all
- You got the format wrong. It should be "According to the studies, 90% of all..."

Actually, balanced hunting may not cause for animals extinction; but, overhunting EXCESSIVE HUNTING put THE animals'generation SPECIES into danger.

Overall, you have made an excellent effort in discussing your research essay. I made it a point to address your questions and some format problems because those were the points that could have affected your essay the most when it comes down to grading it. The rest of the essay, although imperfect in some grammar aspects, manages to deliver clear and coherent thoughts so I did not feel the need to edit that work. Sometimes, the beauty of the essay lies in the simplicity of the writing. The imperfections are good to read because it carries your emotions and opinions in the essay. So the slight problems with the essay are acceptable in my opinion.
OP Furkan 3 / 4  
Nov 23, 2015   #3
Good to see your comments, thank you very much :)
hasbi 29 / 41  
Nov 25, 2015   #4
... caused by natural diseases such as earth quakes EARTHQUAKES, forest fire, lack of rain, extreme cold and high temperature (?)
... if they cannot find suitable conditions, death becomes AN/THE inevitable consequence.

However, in todays THESE DAYS, THE wildfire would be one of the most dangerous wayS , because animals and plants ...

....Then, people started to destroy species' habitats so as to create A/THE new settlement.

As long as human being keeps polluting ON THE air with carbondioxyde CARBON DIOXIDE emission, those organisms will no longer survive.

... stopping some human activities can be the way to reduce THE amount of extinction.

overall your essay too common, there is no specific animal that focus on it to explain. i mean that, from the explanation, give the reader one group animal, for example, like the polar bear in the arctic ocean which have near extinct due to the fact that their habitat (Ice) melting and the number of them has a decrease annually.

good luck


Home / Writing Feedback / What are the reasons for species being extinct ?
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳