CamilaTobar95 2 / 1 Mar 15, 2013 #1QUESTION: Many people visit museums when they travel to new places. Why do you think people visit museums? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.Many people like to visit museums when they travel to new places, other people don't like to visit museums. I personaly tend to visit museums when I'm in a new place because it's good for me know about the culture, tradition and history of other places.The first reason why people are willing to visit museums when they travel to a new territory is that museums provide a tremendous amount of information about different aspects of the history and culture of that place, as I said back. And also taking the chance for making friends. Visit museums can bring you the opportunity to establish relations and knowledge to participate in conversations. And that kind of knowledge speaks very highly of you.However, other people visit museums are the most boring expirience of a trip. My cousin Pedro literaly hates to visit museums but he really enjoyed his visit to the famous London - Madame Tussaud museum, it was kind of art entertainment but also that visit helped him to understand the artist works, and in addition he started to respect and admire other types of arts that offers in other museums.In coclusion, the museums are a visual source to know the history, tradition and culture of any place in the world. I think it's fun and educational.----------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------Please rate my essay, I'm practicing for the TOEFL, how was it?.Thanks
popydevnath 2 / 4 Mar 15, 2013 #2I would say you use same line again and again,,,,,,it is quite boring. But if you chnge sentence like....other pepole many people bla bla it will be interesting. There is a mistake you did not use ''to'' before know.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592 Mar 16, 2013 #3Many people visit museums when they travel to new places. Why do you think people visit museums? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.Many people like to visit museums when they travel to new places, other people don't like to visit museums.... here you tend to go a little bit out of topic. The prompt doesn't talk about any dislikes of people for visiting museums. What it asks is that the reasons for such visits. So, this is not a general argumentative type of topic you find in TOEFL independent writing tasks. So, you need to be careful here. Always read the topic carefully and understand it. And then keep a proper alignment with your topic throughout your essay.
