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The Result of Social Economic Index: A Measurement in Several Represent Regions (IELTS Task 1)


mujahid_fadli 16 / 3 6  
Oct 31, 2015   #1
The table reveals the result of four social and economic index in several represent regions, measured and produced by United Nations statistics in 1994. Overall, while Canada and Japan showed the highest mark in all indicators, Peru and Zaire witnessed reverse trend.

Based on the information, Canada (North America) and Japan (Asia) which are known as developed country experienced a huge score in those variables. In Canada, annual income per person to be quite much at 11,000 US$ and in line with Canada, Japan even reached an income at 15,760 US$. Two indicators presented remained same; life expectancy at birth in Canada (76) and Japan (78), and also adult literacy rate at 99 together. Yet, daily calorie requirement per person between them showed difference at 480 calories; this credit for Canada.

On the other hand, Peru (South America) and Zaire (Africa) presented a negative trend than Canada and Japan. Peru and Zaire experienced quite lower score than Canada-Japan in annual income and calorie supply (both them measured by person), roughly ten times less than them. In addition, life expectancy at birth in Peru (51) and 47 for Zaire. It means a half of Canada and Japan's had on it. Eventually, adult literacy rate became the biggest gap in this statistics, which Peru (68%) and Zaire (34%) from total populations each country.




Pramudita 14 / 11 6  
Nov 1, 2015   #2
Hi Mujahid, these are my suggestion..
Firstly, there are many parentheses used.
secondly, correction for your last paragraph..

On the other hand, Peru (South America) and Zaire (Africa) presented a negative trend than Canada and Japan. Peru and Zaire experienced a quite lower score than Canada-Japan in annual income and calorie supply (both them measured by person),(not both of them which are measured by person, due to annual income is measured by $US)roughly ten times(ten times? i think it just for annual income, how about calorie supply? it also ten times?) less than them(you have to make it clearly) . In addition, life expectancy at birth in Peru (51) and 47 for Zaire.(where is your verb?) It means a half of Canada and Japan's had on it. Eventually, adult literacy rate became the biggest gap in this statistics, which Peru (68%) and Zaire (34%) from total populations each country.


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