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Seek Independence or Live with Parents



Frank zhao 5 / 10  
May 14, 2011   #1
Some young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible. Other young adults prefer to live with their families for a longer time. Which of these situations do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Nowadays, more and more young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible, and more likely, the most effective way is to live independently from their parents to have their own families. Having been influenced by Chinese traditional culture, I do not quite agree with that. In my opinion, young adults should live with my parents to fulfill their filial duty.

For most young adults, their parents need their care. According to psychology knowledge, young adults are people between the ages of 20 to 40. It means that the parents of most young adults are between the ages of 50 to 70, who are getting more and more geriatric. They need someone living with them and take care of them. Besides, old people have more possibility suffering some disease, for example brain congestion. There should be someone present in case of this kind of emergency, because it is difficult for an old couple to deal with such unexpected trouble.

In the meantime, young adults should fulfill their filial duty, especially in China. It is a part of Chinese culture that children have duty or commitment to respect and care their parents in later life. Most likely, the Chinese parents cherish their children and have contributed much more their energy to rise up their children compared with parents in western countries. They have made great efforts to let their children get good education, even get a profitable job. So they deserve the requited love and care from their children. As Chinese young adults, we should not model ourselves on those living in western counties, to leave our parent alone.

Someone might argue that young adults should have their own lives, through which they can have more independence and more productive experience. It might be true, but I do not think that the independence is the top priority. There is something else holds more weight, and the filial responsibility is one of them. What's more, as adults, the role of parents and children should be reversed. Young adults should take charge of daily chores while their parents enjoy their later life. So living with parents does not mean the loss of independence but the responsibility that should be taken.

isai 12 / 111  
May 15, 2011   #2
Greetings !

For most young adults, their parents need their care. According to psychology knowledge, young adults are people between the ages of 20 to 40. It means that the parents of most young adults are between the ages of 50 to 70, who are getting more and more geriatric. They need someone living with them and take ...complex sentence ..you may rephrase the sentence

In my opinion, young adults should live with my parents to fulfill their filial duty. Use this sentence in the beginning of the introduction.

and have contributed much more their energy ..contributed more energy

sounds like direct translated ...

Regards
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
May 16, 2011   #3
Hi Frank, you have some good corrections here. I'll build on them and add new ideas:
For m Most young adults have parents who need their care.

According to psychology knowledge psychologists, young adults are people between the...

Most likely, the Chinese parents cherish their children and have contributed much more of their energy to rise up raise their children. compared with parents in western countries. I took out the comparison, because it is not really related to the point of your essay. Also, it weakens your argument if you make a big generalization like that. Whenever you argue an opinion, so not make a big generalization, because people who disagree with you can easily debunk your argument. (i.e. Many people in the west care deeply for their parents, and many people in Chine abandon their parents.)

They have made great efforts to let their children to get good education and get a profitable job. So they deserve the requited love and care from their children.--Very good sentences here!

As Chinese young adults, we should not model ourselves on those living in western counties by leaving our who leave their parents.

Someone might argue that young adults should have their own lives, so they can have more independence and more productive experience. It might be true, but ..---This is a good paragraph. It makes an important point. Like Annika said, though, it is important to add a conclusion paragraph at the end to reflect on each of the points you made in the body paragraphs.

:-)


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