IELTS TASK 1 : SPENDING ON CONSUMER GOODS IN FRANCE AND THE UK- BAR CHART

money spent on computers, books, cars, perfumes and cameras

The bar chart below shows the expenditure that people in two different countries spent on consumer goods in 2010.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.

The bar chart compares the amount of money (in pounds) spent on five different consumer goods by the residents of France and United Kingdom in the year 2010.

Overall, UK people spend more money on consumer goods compared to French people in the period given. The greatest amount of money was spent on cars in both countries, whereas perfume and cameras were two commodities that UK and French citizens spent the least amount of money respectively.

With regard to cars, UK people spent a total amount of 450000 pounds opposing to the French spending 400000 pounds. Likewise, the expenditure on cameras in the UK was approximately 350000 pounds, over double that of France, which was only 150000 pounds. The British expenditure on books was also superior to the French ( 400000 pounds and 300000 pounds respectively ).

In contrast, the amount of money paid out on remaining consumer goods in France was higher. Above 350000 pounds was spent on computers by French people, exceeding the British who spent exactly 350000 pounds. France went to the expense of perfume with 200000 pounds while this product accounted for nearly 150000 pounds in the UK.

Please help me with my essay. I really appreciate your help !

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I think that you should not use "opposing to" and use "while" instead in the first line of the third paragraph.
Also, I suggest that you should replace "spent" with other words or paraphase in order not to use "spend" too many times
For example, "... spent on five ..." can be paraphased " ... paid for five different ...