Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


The students who only give more focus on learning activity get under pressure, and it's wrong



AhmadNashran 9 / 12  
Nov 3, 2016   #1
In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Answer :

In several nations, the young ages do not have much pastime to do other activities except study. Moreover, the students who only give more focus on learning activity get under pressure which is believed to affect bad impact for them. There are several causes for these phenomena, but also a number of measures we can take which I will outline now.

In my point of view, the main cause is probably the student's high obsession. It is common condition since for some students have a high tendency to compete with their friends to reach high level and score in the school. It is likely called as self's pride when they can be the best among others. Furthermore, related to aforementioned factor, parents take a control of their children include forcing them to learn very diligently. As the effect, their children have to involve to their parents' obsession as well.

As a matter of fact, there are various steps that can be taken to solve the problem. Actually, there is no wrong with an obsession, but usually by having too high obsession, it causes uncontrolled self. Because of that, the children have to control their obsession by understanding that they need to freeze up their mind and give portion for their brain and body. Moreover, parents have to realize that getting a lot of pressure affects bad impact for their children's health. In the event that both parents and children cooperate in managing time to study, it will probably help them to control their obsession and good for their health.

To sum up, we can say that high personal obsession and parent's pressure are the keys causes behind these trend. However, it can be solve by cooperating both of them in understanding impact of too high obsession and a lot of pressure. Managing time to study is the important way to tackle that condition as well.

asmaraj96 9 / 11  
Nov 3, 2016   #2
Hi @AhmadNashran,

Here a few corrections on your essay:

1. ... also a number of measures can be used to cope this notion.we can take which I will outline now.
2. ..., but usually by having too high obsession, itwill causecauses uncontrolled self.

Hope those corrections are useful :)


Home / Writing Feedback / The students who only give more focus on learning activity get under pressure, and it's wrong
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳