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TED Summary: The Taboo Secret To Better Health by Molly Winter


Iedha01 21 / 40  
Sep 21, 2016   #1
Molly Winter reveals her idea in making innovation in sanitation. She said that about seven millions people got sick and 900 people died annually in US. It is caused of drinking sewage water. Every morning you go to the toilet and take a shower, then, have you ever think where are those things go? She asked her audiences. She mention one taboo issue about excrement and feces( in the scientific words) or "poo" and "pee"( childish word) which can be used to fertilize the food. Thus, if we can get those into our soil bank, it is going to absorb carbon dioxide that we put into the air. It helps to slow the global warming. Therefore, she introduces her organisation as Recode. It is about integrate water management approach. She gave the example one of the high-rise residential building in downtown of Portland. They are not flushing to the sewer system, but their wash water is reused by using cool mechanical system. It is useful for watering the landscape and giving nutrients to the plants. It is the updating the surrounding sewer infrastructure. Finally, some brave and open-minded people sit down and feel comfortable saying " that makes sense", and we can save energy and save money.

hanachi 3 / 9 2  
Sep 21, 2016   #2
hallo Iedha01,
i have corrected your writing, i want to give some suggests

1. at this sentence: "have you ever thinkwhere are those things go?" should be "have you ever think where is those things go?

2. at this sentence: "She mention one taboo issue" should added '-s', cause before mention there is 'she as a subject', so should be "She mentions one taboo issue"

thank you, wish it useful. keep writing ^^
RAY93 35 / 186 136  
Sep 22, 2016   #3
She said that about seven millions ...

she said that about seven millions Americans got sick while 900 died annually by sewage-contaminated water consumption

She mentionED one taboo issue about [tenses, subject+verb agreement]

if we can get those into our soil bank, ...

if we can get those into our soil bank, it goes to absorb carbon dioxide.....
it goes to absorb..... if we can get those into....


she introduces her organisation as Recode.

she has introduced her organisation named...

integrateD water management approach

She gave the example one of the high-rise residential buildingS in downtown of Portland as an example . They are not flushing to the sewer system, but their wash water (...) mechanical system indeed .. It is the updating the surrounding sewer infrastructure.
Jawa 11 / 17 1  
Sep 22, 2016   #4
hi... ledha01
let me try to give you some corrections

... and take a shower, then, have you ever think where are those things go? She asked her audiences

please pay more attention on your tenses (the pattern of present perfect = Subject + Have/has + V3 + O) so that this will become ...

It is about integrate water management approach

the word " integrate" is a verb so that you have to alter into an adjective first, then you can make into a noun phrase.

hope this helps,
thanks
bismillah 15 / 29 1  
Sep 22, 2016   #5
hi ledha i have suggestions on your essay to be better

It is caused by drinking sewage water.

have you ever think where are those things going?

feel comfortable and saying, " that makes sense", that can be better in reading
your grammatical error is good but you pay more attention about cohesion and punctuation
i hope,it can help you


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