Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


Talent and Hard Work as an Important Key to be Success



mem77 62 / 93  
Sep 21, 2016   #1
These days, many people want to be a successful and do everything to achieve their goals. Most of them believe that if they have a natural ability and talented, it is easier to achieve their dreams. However, it is not only about "The Gift from God" but also you have to be hard worker to reach your dreams.

If you want to be a famous people, you have to be talented first. Many people who have talented and natural ability are easier to reach their dreams, such as International footballer, Lionel Messi. He realized that he had talented on football, so he started to play it when he was a child. Not for a long time since he started to play football, many academic football club seen his talented and tried to pick him as their part. After that, Lionel Messi becomes a new wonder kid on football world because of his talented.

However, practice hard and regularly is important, too. Even though someone had a talent and natural ability, if they did not do anything to make their ability improved maximally, it makes them to be a poor one. They have to train regularly to improve their capability and also to boost their own talented.

In conclusion, I do not think you can reach your dreams just used your own talent and your natural ability. There are many factors can help you to be famous or successful person, such as you have practice hard and regularly, and also you can pay a trainer to improve your ability. Every people have a different way and history to make their dreams becoming true. As such, when people become successful one with their talent, maybe you can successful too like them with different ways and attitudes.

Iedha01 21 / 38  
Sep 21, 2016   #2
Hi there,
I think your essay is good enough, however I still found some mistakes there, let me share it,

-However, it is not only about "The Gift from God" but also you have to be hard worker TO REACH YOUR DREAMS.
-Many people who have TALENTED and natural ability are easier TO REACH YOUR DREAMS, such as International footballer, Lionel Messi.

(In the two sentences above, you repeated the same phrases. Why don't you use the other words, such as TO ACHIEVE YOUR GOAL) try to use the synonym)

TALENTED is a past verb, thus you should put a noun there, just put TALENT there.
Avoid the repetition word by using the synonym or pharaprasing it)).


Home / Writing Feedback / Talent and Hard Work as an Important Key to be Success
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳