Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 4


How technology affected the types of relationships people make?



nzy576 1 / -  
Jan 2, 2014   #1
Thank you for you comments:)

Due to the rapid development of technology such as Internet and telecommunication, people have more options in contacting with each other than before.

In the past, when the communication methods are limited, people simply rely on writing letters to send messages, which usually need much time to receive, needless to say reply. Thus social circles are limited to a small scale because of this inconvenient communication. By contrast, in modern times things have changed dramatically in terms of contact methods and efficiency. The widespread use of internet and cellphones has a great impact on people's daily life, especially in their social activities. That cellphones for example, it has become a must in our personal belongings, with the unique advantage to link to friends instantly wherever they are. What's more, voice and even image can both be transmitted owing to the increase of bandwidth. All these changes make the relationship of people more tightened. Parents can learn about the current situation of their children just like the kids are in front of them, and lovers can whisper to each other even though they are at a great distance.

However, technology is often a two-edged sword which can bring us some side effect unconsciously. Nowadays more and more people are realizing that they have addicted to these advanced equipment, some even feel uncomfortable when the cellphones are away from them. And another drawback is that one can seldom find an intimate friend in his or her wider and wider social circle because there is little time to spare to have intimate association with others.

In conclusion, technology advances have made a variety of benefits to our daily life. Although there are some negatives, we can overcome them by shifting our habits to make our lives more colorful

ozymandias - / 2  
Jan 2, 2014   #2
In a way, technology has helped, even when it seems like it was never even involved.
Since the glorious technology of recording has been invented, people all over the world have been able to connect on a different, more intimate level, because they share similar interests in music.

Without some of this technology, we might have never progressed, and world peace will have never even been in sight.
Music gives everyone a feelgood mindset, and depending on which genre it is, people share their interests with other people, and so forth.
Arun0506 27 / 119  
Jan 13, 2014   #3
Hi,
Try to provide two or three support facts to your position in para 2 rather the circling within one feature like here about communication.
Good Luck!!!

Regards,
Arun
Pahan 1 / 1824  
Jan 14, 2014   #4
Yes, you need to improve your essay structure. Especially, your body paragraphs seem to be extensively longer. It is better that you have one reason per one body para to justify your position in the argument. Then support that reason with a more specific example. That way, if you have three different reasons, you should have three separate body paras.


Home / Writing Feedback / How technology affected the types of relationships people make?
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳