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IELTS TASK 2 TOPIC: GOVERNMENT AND SOCIETY



chloeng1301 1 / 2  
Mar 24, 2022   #1
TASK 2:
Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country.


Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.



- It is true that in the contemporary world, governments tend to gravitate towards developing the economy only, people, wheraeas, hold a belief that it would be better if the investment could be spent equally for other industries such as education and healthcare. Personally, I am in the flavor of the latter for several reasons.

- It is obvious that the economy plays an important role in the development of each nation. A country with the potential economic ability is able to limit the residents' poverty. By investing more in the economy, the government could offer a variety of employment for local people, which leads to a reduction in joblessness. From there, that country would not be suffered from financial burden from unemployed individuals. Moreover, the economy is also considered as a ruler to measure one nation's development In fact, when looking at a specific country, the first and criteria would be judged is GDP (Gross Domestic Product). According to the Administration Office, 2021 Vietnam's GDP was recorded at around 271 billion USD, which is considered as a strong developing nation.

On the other hand, besides the economy, I believe that the government should pay more attention to different industries to become a totally-developed country. Firstly, governments should allocate resources to education. It cannot deny that education is crucial to a nation's future. If the children are not well-educated, they would get into illegal activities and become juvenile crimes, which would be a big problem for every country. Secondly, healthcare also should be invested. The government is ought to enhance the life quality of residents by building more hospitals and improving the welfare system. Once people are fully-supplied, they will devote themselves to their country, which would push the development of the economy.

In conclusion, the economy is vital to all nations around the world, though, governments should spend resources equally in other indutries to develop comprehensively.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15369  
Mar 24, 2022   #2
The writer has written more than the required wordcount, but failed to proofread, edit, and discuss the given topic in the assigned format. From spelling errors, incorrect word usage, and disconnected reasoning paragraphs, the writer could have avoided these scoring deductions if he did not prioritize the word count over the quality of the presentation. I need not point out these obvious errors. The student should be able to easily spot these avoidable mistakes if he takes the time to review the paper now.

The writer even goes so far as to alter the topic foundation by offering his personal opinion in the first sentence of the restatement. A big no - no that always results in point deductions. The opinion is always at the end of that paragraph, consolidated with the thesis statement.

The provided discussions do not assess the public s against the writer's previously given statement. To presenta cohesive discussion, the public opinion must be considered along with his apposition or support in the paragraph. General discussions like these are seen as personal opinion alone in most cases. Without the paragraph comparisons, these will only be scored in a limited manner.
minahaya2020 2 / 4  
Mar 24, 2022   #3
Hello, I think you didn't explain "the most important" aspect of economy, should focus on that. Then should have a post signing to support for idea "other sector is important too".
OP chloeng1301 1 / 2  
Mar 24, 2022   #4
@Holt Thank you for your recommendations ! I will check my assignment again and correct my errors


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