IELTS Topic: Same job for a same company VS change job frequently

Some people prefer the same job for a same company, but others like to change jobs frequently. Discuss the both side and give your own preference.

With the economic growth in recent years, while some employees intend to commit the same position in one organisation for a long time, others are keen to explore their possibilities in different enterprises. Generally speaking, the latter practice is more desirable than the former one in the modern society. 49

It is accepted that individuals who committing an unchanged job for a relatively long period of time gain some benefits. One is that it increases their chances of international promotion. Unlike job-hoppers, loyal employees are usually deemed as the highly skilled and experienced human talent because of their comprehensive understanding of their businesses' operations and administrations. Secondly, staff could obtain a sense of security through a long term service. The reason for this is that they are likely to receive the priority when comes to salary package review and employment contract renewal. 92

However, there are arguments in favour of changing job regularly. Firstly, job-hopping maximises a higher remuneration possibility and brings a more promising career prospect. Sports professionals, for instance, frequently transfer the clubs they are playing for is an ideal strategy to obtain more opportunities to present in a number of international and well-known competitions. Moreover, if the jobs the candidates are engaging with currently suits neither their personality nor skills or qualification they hold, trying other types of opportunities is a preferred change. As a result, the circumstance destructs their mental soundness and their potentials in other areas. 98

In conclusion, it is convincing that non job-hoppers enjoy some benefits from long term employment. However, the merits of changing job regularly could be beneficial for employees to maintain a positive career orientation and health well-being.

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Well... As a reader. I really want to know your reason after I finished reading your introduction. I am eager to know why you think job-hopping is better. But you just stopped. I think if you could use one sentences or a few words to clearly assert the reason, I would easily grasp your idea. Nevertheless, it is just my opinion. You do not need to change the structure of your paragraph.

I know repetition should be avoided in essay writing. Nevertheless, you use the word "commit" incorrectly.

Here is the right way:
Commit sb to sth
Commit sb to (doing) sth

"to" cannot be deleted.

You can look up in a dictionary.

I want to use Participial Construction. It can link two sentences that have the same subject. But your sentence is correct.

"Who" should not be deleted, otherwise you need to replace "transfer" with "transferring".

Best regards,

Hi basawang,


Probably what you thought is right in other kinds of essay writings. But I don't think this is the way I should follow in an IELTS essay writing. Many thanks.

Your are half right. This is the example sentence I found from dictionary: I would advise people to think very carefully about committing themselves to working Sundays...

"to" should stay, you are right. :-)

I see. No wonder why. Thank you.


I see, let me work out it by checking my grammar book. Anyway many thanks.

cheers

Hello guysss. I am new Student on this site. My essay due last week but i have no clue what to do. I am not understanding the essay. it is a Toulin Essay. The Topic is "Should college students wear school uniform" I agreed with this topic. However , i am following a example of someone else toulmin;s essay. i can really use alot of help PLEASE! Here is what i got so far. THANKS SO MUCH please!

Toulmin Essay
Should uniform be Implemented for College Students In The B.V.I
Recently, study had shown that the majority of parents prefer uniform rather than casual clothing.(THIS IS THE INTRODUCTION. I DON'T KNO WHAT TO WRITE HERE)

One reason that we should implement uniform is that it causes less distraction. According to Mr James D'Castro, the Principal of Harvard's University confirms that wearing casual outrageous clothing indeed causes more distraction. He says, "School Uniform policy ensures that a student comes to school in appropriate clothing thus, avoiding distractions and wearing revelling clothing. Most students considered college as a fashion show. School Uniform helps to focus on studies and it gives the students a great deal of comfort in wearing school uniform. Recent studies show that eighty five percent of teachers and parents in the BVI said that wearing casual clothing causes great distraction to students and hampered their academic performance. Statistics also claim that 65% of parents have found that their kids are more focused in school after wearing uniforms. My experience wearing uniform serves a great deal in me getting less distracted and focus more on my studies compared to the time where I did attended a college where they was no uniform required. I would always want to look good and want to fit in the crowd, and always get distracted with the type of clothing others wore. This caused my grades to flop because it was clear that no attention was being paid when students wear casual clothing.